I walked into the party like I was walking into a scene.<\/p>\n
(I was only there for journalistic reasons, not to party, hence I was not violating Judaism’s laws against partying during the three weeks of mourning leading up to Tisha B’Av.)<\/p>\n
I held up my two cans of caffeine-free Diet Coke and yelled, "Who’s ready to party? I brought the Diet Coke. Best to cut it with water."<\/p>\n
I left after an hour so I could return to my Torah studies.<\/p>\n
The next day, I asked a host of the party what was the most inappropriate thing said or done last night. She replied it was when I put my arm around her and said, "Tell Uncle Levi where it hurts."<\/p>\n
Who’s your rebbe now, bitch? Show me where it hurts.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I walked into the party like I was walking into a scene. (I was only there for journalistic reasons, not to party, hence I was not violating Judaism’s laws against partying during the three weeks of mourning leading up to … Continue reading