{"id":84478,"date":"2016-01-04T15:30:47","date_gmt":"2016-01-04T23:30:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=84478"},"modified":"2016-01-04T15:30:47","modified_gmt":"2016-01-04T23:30:47","slug":"day-of-judgment","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=84478","title":{"rendered":"Day Of Judgment"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><A HREF=\"http:\/\/www.newyorker.com\/magazine\/2016\/01\/11\/day-of-judgment\">From the latest edition of The New Yorker<\/a>:<\/p>\n<p>The Messiah floated gently down Eighth Avenue, His arms spread wide, as if to hug mankind. Traffic stopped and people gawked, their eyes and iPhones pointed toward the heavens. All who gazed upon Him knew at once why He was here: Earth was saved and all their pain was ending.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"52\" data-wc=\"52\">His throne came to a stop above Times Square, beside the giant Sony screen. He was fifty feet tall and beautifully proportioned, with golden skin and eyes like polished sapphires. A pair of cherubs sat on his shoulders, playing silver trumpets. Their song was so beautiful that it moved people to tears.<\/p>\n<p>\u201c<em>I am the Messiah<\/em>,\u201d the deity announced, as if there were any question. \u201c<em>And I have come to bring you all salvation<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"14\" data-wc=\"14\">Some reporters had assembled on the street. The Messiah smiled down on them indulgently.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"16\" data-wc=\"16\"> \u201c<em>Feel free to ask me what you wish<\/em>,\u201d He said. \u201c<em>Chris Matthews, you can go first<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"30\" data-wc=\"30\">\u201cThank you,\u201d the news anchor said. He was trying his best to remain composed, but his cheeks were damp with tears. \u201cWhat, exactly, do you mean by \u2018salvation\u2019?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"15\" data-wc=\"15\">\u201c<em>All suffering will cease<\/em>,\u201d the Messiah answered. \u201c<em>And Earth shall be turned into a heaven<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"11\" data-wc=\"11\">The crowd cheered wildly. Strangers embraced. The elderly danced like children.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"13\" data-wc=\"13\">\u201c<em>Anderson Cooper, you go next. You\u2019ve had your hand up the longest<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"16\" data-wc=\"16\">\u201cThank you,\u201d the correspondent said. \u201cI was wondering what this means for the world\u2019s poor?\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"42\" data-wc=\"42\">\u201c<em>Deliverance<\/em>,\u201d the Messiah said. \u201c<em>The poor shall eat, the lame shall walk, and all wars shall be ended! <\/em>\u201d The cheering grew so loud that the Messiah had to shout to be heard. \u201c<em>O.K., who\u2019s next<\/em>? <em>How about you, Al Roker<\/em>?\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"3\" data-wc=\"3\">The cheering stopped.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"13\" data-wc=\"13\">\u201c<em>What\u2019s wrong<\/em>?\u201d the Messiah asked. The cherubs whispered something into His ear.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"23\" data-wc=\"23\"> \u201c<em>Oh<\/em>,\u201d He said, turning pale. \u201c<em>I\u2019m sorry. I meant Al Sharpton<\/em>.\u201d He cleared His throat and forced a smile. \u201c<em>Go ahead, sir! <\/em>\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"13\" data-wc=\"13\">Al Sharpton glared up at Him, his arms folded tightly across his chest.<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"15\" data-wc=\"15\"> \u201c<em>You were going to ask me something<\/em>?\u201d the Messiah pressed on. \u201c<em>Go ahead, ask away<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n<p word_count=\"18\" data-wc=\"18\">\u201cO.K.,\u201d Al Sharpton said. \u201cI guess my question is: Why did you confuse me with Al Roker?\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From the latest edition of The New Yorker: The Messiah floated gently down Eighth Avenue, His arms spread wide, as if to hug mankind. Traffic stopped and people gawked, their eyes and iPhones pointed toward the heavens. All who gazed &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=84478\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-84478","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-race"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84478","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=84478"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84478\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":84479,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84478\/revisions\/84479"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=84478"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=84478"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=84478"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}