{"id":8282,"date":"2009-02-21T19:36:48","date_gmt":"2009-02-22T03:36:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=8282"},"modified":"2009-02-23T14:36:17","modified_gmt":"2009-02-23T22:36:17","slug":"i-offered-to-bring-cocoa-krispies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=8282","title":{"rendered":"I Offered To Bring Cocoa Krispies"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was invited to Shabbat dinner at the home of friends.<\/p>\n

"What should I bring?" I asked.<\/p>\n

I got the answer: "Hmmm one of Levi’s classics."<\/p>\n

"I’ll bring Cocoa Krispies," I replied.<\/p>\n

I still have three bowls from LimmudLA 2008 when I was given packages of them to take home and give to a homeless shelter, which I interpreted as meaning my hovel.<\/p>\n

The word came back that I should bring challah.<\/p>\n

So I go to Elat Market Friday morning and pick up a raisin challah, but when I bring it with me at 7 pm Friday, I find out I was expected to bring two plain challah loaves. Oy ve! That is so obvious. Of course you need two challah loaves to make hamotzi. How could I have been so dumb? I’ll not make that mistake again.<\/p>\n

Just as I was starting to overcome that shame, one of the hosts announced: "Levi used to write for the porn industry<\/a>."<\/p>\n

That was a long awkward silence.<\/p>\n

"He wrote it in a book!" my host defended.<\/p>\n

Eventually I got into a conversation with a young woman who told me after five minutes, "No more questions!"<\/p>\n

I get that a lot.<\/p>\n

When I started joking about making out with the younger sister of my friend, I got told, "Levi! Inhibit!"<\/p>\n

Imagine that! My very own Alexander Technique language getting used against me.<\/p>\n

Three hours is about my limit for socializing and I came home at 10 pm.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I was invited to Shabbat dinner at the home of friends. "What should I bring?" I asked. I got the answer: "Hmmm one of Levi’s classics." "I’ll bring Cocoa Krispies," I replied. I still have three bowls from LimmudLA 2008 … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[1178,5312,824,638,810,1211],"class_list":["post-8282","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-cocoa-krispies","tag-homeless-shelter","tag-hovel","tag-oy-ve","tag-shabbat","tag-shabbat-dinner"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t