* For the past 45 years, people have told me that my sloppiness will be my undoing.<\/p>\n
* Friend: “You misfiled again!”
\nLuke: “Will you be my sponsor for Underearners Anonymous?”
\nFriend: “Sure, I’ll do a 5150 and have you taken to the mental ward.”<\/p>\n
* I learn about who I am from the frequent things people say to me, such as, “Dude, that was wayyyyy to fast!”<\/p>\n
* I just learned you can get Workers Comp for psychiatric problems!<\/p>\n
* Do you have to have work before you can get workers comp?<\/p>\n
* Do you ever find yourself hating whole groups of people, such as gays\/trannies\/blacks\/Jews\/Muslims\/Mexicans etc and if so, what do you do with these feelings? How do you healthfully release them?<\/p>\n
* I asked my friend to set me up. He said: “We need to duct tape your mouth and you’ll have a fighting chance.”<\/p>\n
* I threatened my friend to dedicate my next book to his family.<\/p>\n
* Are you also going through life on bald tires, hoping someone will take care of you?<\/p>\n
* If I turn my will and my life over to the care of God today, at least I’ll no longer have an idiot running the show.<\/p>\n
* A friend from the Valley says: “you were the dog’s bollocks then…now you’re a talmud hochem.”<\/p>\n
* Some women flake on me because they need to buy a new parrot, others because they must assemble furniture from Ikea and others because this was the anniversary of the Sixth Lubavitcher Rebbe getting released from a Russian jail.<\/p>\n
* Converting Sephardi? Is that like becoming black?<\/p>\n
* Miriam Lilian D Or I knew an Ashkenazi man who did this. He must be happy eating meat now and rice during Pesach.<\/p>\n
Marc Dome \u00b7 2 mutual friends
\nI wouldn’t even call the both of you light entertainment. You’re probably made for one another. I used to keep Sephardic halachot and didn’t eat rice. Not all Sephardim eat rice.<\/p>\n
Miriam Lilian D Or You haven’t been following Luke’s posts long enough. The Ashkenazi to Sephardic man I was referring to was my fiance, and a fine man he is (still my friend). Once again, I get a good talking to from posting on Luke’s post, probably because satire is lost in translation. As distasteful as I am here is an interesting article. http:\/\/www.dailyhalacha.com\/displayRead.asp?readID=537<\/p>\n
Chaim Amalek Why do yidden eat rice? It is for the yellow ones. Hashem made wheat for real yidden to eat, like on Mt. Sinai.<\/p>\n
Miriam Lilian D Or 5 out of 1 fiances\/boyfriends dislike my commenting on Luke’s posts.<\/p>\n
Marc Dome \u00b7 2 mutual friends
\nWho cares what anyone thinks, and a fine man he is! ( one for you here Luke). Thanks for the Halacha article, I like a rice story! Maybe wrong continent?!?!<\/p>\n
Marc Dome \u00b7 2 mutual friends
\nI got it wrong. I thought the Ashkenazi man was Luke! Well, you’re both fine men even now and you’re a fine man too!!<\/p>\n
* I want to thank the maid for the great job she did cleaning the kitchen but fear she’ll think I want to Governator her.<\/p>\n
* Friend: So….who was the blonde girl you were playing with in my dream? She was resting on the floor and you were playing with her hair.
\nL: Can you tell me more?
\nYes, long blonde hair
\nBut, I think it was dyed blonde
\nShe was kind of busty
\nI was walking by and saw the two of you in my wood cabin. She was just resting. I saw you sitting next to her, holding her hair. I didn’t see what happened next.
\nWell, more like caressing her hair. You had an happy look.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
* For the past 45 years, people have told me that my sloppiness will be my undoing. * Friend: “You misfiled again!” Luke: “Will you be my sponsor for Underearners Anonymous?” Friend: “Sure, I’ll do a 5150 and have you … Continue reading