{"id":67052,"date":"2015-04-06T10:32:57","date_gmt":"2015-04-06T18:32:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=67052"},"modified":"2023-06-02T05:04:18","modified_gmt":"2023-06-02T13:04:18","slug":"torah-talks-passover","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=67052","title":{"rendered":"Torah Talks: Passover (4-7-15)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><script>!function(r,u,m,b,l,e){r._Rumble=b,r[b]||(r[b]=function(){(r[b]._=r[b]._||[]).push(arguments);if(r[b]._.length==1){l=u.createElement(m),e=u.getElementsByTagName(m)[0],l.async=1,l.src=\"https:\/\/rumble.com\/embedJS\/uajap1\"+(arguments[1].video?'.'+arguments[1].video:'')+\"\/?url=\"+encodeURIComponent(location.href)+\"&args=\"+encodeURIComponent(JSON.stringify([].slice.apply(arguments))),e.parentNode.insertBefore(l,e)}})}(window, document, \"script\", \"Rumble\");<\/script><\/p>\n<div id=\"rumble_v2p0028\"><\/div>\n<p><script>\nRumble(\"play\", {\"video\":\"v2p0028\",\"div\":\"rumble_v2p0028\"});<\/script><\/p>\n<p>* A traditional Passover seder takes a minimum of three hours with lots of long readings. If you are with people you love, it&#8217;s fun. If you are not with people you love, it is hard time. You won&#8217;t eat before 10pm at a traditional seder after two hours of recitation and ritual.<\/p>\n<p>* My secular Jewish friend has this theory that Jews come from space aliens, they were touched by the hand of God, and they were given a task by God to deliver a message to the world so for that they were given extra industry and industriousness. He does not mention anything about a more flexible moral code.<\/p>\n<p>* My secular friends had a seder, 50% Gentile. They spent 30 minutes going around the table saying what they were grateful for and then the hosts said, yay God, let&#8217;s eat.<\/p>\n<p>* &#8220;Matthew Weiner [of Mad Men] is 5\u20197\u2033 and looks like a evil little gremlin. I usually look at people\u2019s physical appearance before I evaluate what they have to say nowadays.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>* I let a Jew eat one of my hardboiled eggs and I get the 10th degree from him at high volume down the hallway about how fresh are they, who boiled them, why don&#8217;t they peel right, am I going to end up in the UCLA emergency room?<\/p>\n<p>Jews do a lot of complaining in the Torah reading for the seventh day of Passover: They said to Moses: &#8220;Are there no graves in Egypt, that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? Why have you done this to us, to carry us out of Egypt?<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Is not this the word that we did tell you in Egypt, saying: Let us alone, that we may serve Egypt? For it would have been better for us to serve Egypt, than to die in the wilderness.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>* &#8220;As the children of Israel march forward, the divine cloud which had been leading them moves to their rear, interposing between them and the Egyptians.&#8221; It&#8217;s important that Jews use lots of double talk to obfuscate what they are up to and let that rhetoric be a cloud between them and the goyim.<\/p>\n<p>* &#8220;What shall we drink?&#8221; complain the people.<\/p>\n<p>I couldn&#8217;t find kosher for Passover diet caffeine-free sodas I like to drink. All the kosher for Passover Coke had caffeine.<\/p>\n<p>*  &#8220;If you will diligently hearken to the voice of G-d&#8230; all the diseases which I have brought upon Egypt, I shall not bring upon you, for I am G-d your healer.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Yeah, if you abstain from homo sex and sharing drug needles, you&#8217;ll be less likely to get AIDS. If you refrain from slutting around, you&#8217;ll be less likely to get shot and to get sued and to get nasty STDs.<\/p>\n<p>* &#8220;Would we had died by the hand of G-d in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the flesh pots, and when we ate our fill of bread; for you have brought us out into this wilderness, to kill this whole community with hunger.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>* Amalek are the bad guys because they picked on the weakest and sickest of the Israelites. Why would they not? If you want to fight a guerrilla war, you go after the vulnerable.<\/p>\n<p>* G-d led them not through the way of the land of the Philistines (13:17)<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.chabad.org\/parshah\/in-depth\/default_cdo\/aid\/36138\/jewish\/Beshalach-In-Depth.htm\">Chabad<\/a>: The tribe of Ephraim had erred and departed from Egypt 30 years before the destined time, with the result that three hundred thousand of them were slain by the Philistines&#8230; and their bones lay in heaps on the road&#8230; G-d therefore said: If Israel behold the bones of the sons of Ephraim strewn in the road, they will return to Egypt&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>* <a href=\"http:\/\/www.chabad.org\/parshah\/article_cdo\/aid\/39992\/jewish\/Passover-Torah-Readings.htm\">From Chabad.org<\/a>: On the <b>SEVENTH DAY OF PASSOVER<\/b> we read how on this day the <b><a href=\"\/article.asp?AID=42014\" aid=\"42014\">sea split<\/a><\/b> for the Children of Israel and drowned the <b><a href=\"\/library\/article_cdo\/aid\/2972\/jewish\/Chapter-I-The-Arrest.htm\" title=\"Chapter I: The Arrest\">pursuing Egyptians<\/a><\/b>, and the &#8220;<b><a href=\"\/library\/article_cdo\/aid\/1398\/jewish\/Is-G-d-Religious.htm\" title=\"Is G-d Religious?\">Song at the Sea<\/a><\/b>&#8221; sung by the people upon their deliverance (<a href=\"\/9874#v17\">Exodus 13:17<\/a>-15:26; full summary with commentary <a href=\"\/parshah\/in-depth\/default_cdo\/aid\/36138\/jewish\/Beshalach-In-Depth.htm\" title=\"Beshalach In Depth\">here<\/a>).<\/p>\n<p>On the <b>EIGHTH DAY OF PASSOVER<\/b> we read <a href=\"\/9979#v19\">Deuteronomy 15:19<\/a>-16:17. Like the reading for the second day, it catalogs the annual cycle of festivals, their special observances, and the offerings brought on these occasions to the Holy Temple in <span onclick=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.CompleteShow(this);\" onmouseover=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.Show(this);\" onmouseout=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.Hide(this);\" class=\"glossary_item\" glossary_item=\"11447\">Jerusalem<\/span>. The Eighth Day&#8217;s special connection with the <b><a href=\"\/article.asp?AID=42018\" aid=\"42018\">Future Redemption<\/a><\/b> is reflected in the <span onclick=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.CompleteShow(this);\" onmouseover=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.Show(this);\" onmouseout=\"Co.Tools.Content.Glossary.Hide(this);\" class=\"glossary_item\" glossary_item=\"12335\">Haftorah<\/span> (reading from the Prophets) for this day (<a href=\"\/library\/article_cdo\/aid\/2859\/jewish\/Isaiah-on-Moshiach.htm\" title=\"Isaiah on Moshiach\"><b>Isaiah 10:32-12:6<\/b><\/a>).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>* A traditional Passover seder takes a minimum of three hours with lots of long readings. If you are with people you love, it&#8217;s fun. If you are not with people you love, it is hard time. You won&#8217;t eat &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=67052\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1968],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-67052","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-passover"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67052","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=67052"}],"version-history":[{"count":24,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67052\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":148515,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67052\/revisions\/148515"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=67052"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=67052"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=67052"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}