{"id":2871,"date":"2008-05-04T13:22:26","date_gmt":"2008-05-04T21:22:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2871"},"modified":"2008-05-04T17:07:20","modified_gmt":"2008-05-05T01:07:20","slug":"emmas-great-california-vacation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2871","title":{"rendered":"Emma&#8217;s Great California Vacation"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/yourmoralleader.camstreams.com\/\">From my live cam chat<\/a>:<\/p>\n<p>Emma:&nbsp; You know&#8230;.<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; I think its time for a trim<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; trim of what?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Of&#8230;<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Your&#8230;<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Beard&#8230;&#8230;..<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; charisma?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I&#8217;d lose my moral strength<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; like samson<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Of course not<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Hey Lass<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; hi emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; M, we&#8217;re in a time of the jewish calendar when one is not permitted to shave or cut one&#8217;s hair<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; so sorry<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Yeah sure<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; you can trim me when you come out<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; no it&#8217;s true emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; QL, explain the sefira to Emma<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; You cant shave?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; nope<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Whaaaaaaaaaaat<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Why?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; boss was married to a rabbi<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; she knows why<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; it&#8217;s the counting of the omer.&nbsp; from the time passover starts until Shavuot (literally &quot;feast of weeks&quot;) you are not permitted to cut your hair or get married<br \/>\nguest33:&nbsp; U PLANK!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; I see<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; hahah<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; i&#8217;m going wild<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; no woman will get me to trim<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; for 49 days you are in a kind of mourning<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; except emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; and she has to trim me in person<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; with kindness<br \/>\nguest33:&nbsp; TWAT<br \/>\nUser guest33 was banned by broadcaster\/admin.<br \/>\nUser guest33 left the room.<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; What if I cut you<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; if you make me bleed, you&#8217;re not getting any sex from me.<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; not even when we&#8217;re married<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Fine&#8230;<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Shave yourself<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; maybe you can pull the hairs out one by one<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; if you don&#8217;t have sex when you&#8217;re married, you won&#8217;t really be married<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Yeah that wont hurt much<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; do you shave emma?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Of course<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; omg.&nbsp; <br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Just not my face Luke&#8230;.<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; moustache?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; Emma!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Too late<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; What??<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; What i do!<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; hehe<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; you are a lech<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; Levi, not emma<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; So where is the nearest b&amp;b to you Luke?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; Levi, you had more fun than I did last night<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; what&#8217;s a b&amp;B?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; bed and breakfast<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Right<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I got one right here at the hovel<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; then there&#8217;s julie&#8217;s house<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; nearby<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Julie&#8230; where is the nearest b&amp;b?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; but you can stay with me, M<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; there are hotels near me<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; your bed is barely big enough for you<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; M&#8217;s not fat<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; don&#8217;t they charge by the hour?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Exactly<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; don&#8217;t be a princess Emma, you&#8217;ll love the hovel<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Hotel.. too expensive<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; hovel&#8217;s free<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Im not being a princess Luke<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; everything here is expensive<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; esp b&amp;b<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; no need to fear for your virtue<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Where exactly do I sleep?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; in the fridge<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; the hotels are cheap about $50 a night<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; you would have my bed Emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; and I&#8217;d sleep at your feet by the computer<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; you can trust me<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; $50\/night?&nbsp; omg&nbsp; I would have to bring lysol and my own linen<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Of course I can&#8230; <br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; But you know.. I&#8217;m meeting you for the first time<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; bring your dad into the chatroom, we&#8217;ll sort this out right now<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; I doubt that will happen<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; any hotel that costs $50\/night is too scuzzy for Emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; we&#8217;ll be on the road most of the time Emma<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; sleeping in the back of my van<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; You&#8217;d have to take her to the Tower<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; of London?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; of Beverwil and Pico<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; too expensive<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Your van&#8230;.<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; too far away<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; it&#8217;s walking distance<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; but I&#8217;ll be too tired from walking to try anything<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; exaaaaactly \ud83d\ude42<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; I wonder if this light therapy is helping him?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol who knows<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; he does seem cheerier after a stint in the sun<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; he may die of skin cancer though<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; that&#8217;s a gross way to die<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; not as gross as say, falling into a vat of snot and drowning, but fairly disgusting.<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; not too much sunlight in the hovel<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Whoa lmao<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; What a thought Lass<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; snot true!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; No the&nbsp; most awful way to die?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Buried alive<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; that&#8217;s pretty bad<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; Do you think Luke will die young?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; The conversations we have in this chat room are so inspiring <br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; Or live to a ripe old age with Emma at his side<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; those are the two choices?<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; in his \/ her rocking chairs<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; they inspire me <br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; to get a life!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Rocking chairs<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; BC <br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Its 2008 now 42<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; Luke can&#8217;t afford leather recliners<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Yet<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; as long as he rocks your world<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; you are such an optimist!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; realist<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; one of the chairs in the hovel is leather-like<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; I dont get along with realists very well<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Im too much of a dreamer<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; a vegetarian thru and thru<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; should I leave?<br \/>\nQuixoticLass:&nbsp; he has decorated in the style of &quot;early garage sale&quot;<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; Of course not<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; Travel tip for Emma: Any hotel in LA that is not likely to give you bedbugs is going to cost at least $200\/night<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; Expect it, with taxes, to cost at least 100 Euros \/ night of sanity<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; This is a very verdant scene.&nbsp; Complete with fly<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; SWAT<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; Emma, instead of LA, visit London!<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; It&#8217;s happening, and it freaks me out!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; hmmm no<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; London is where it&#8217;s at.<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; Instead of &quot;bloggers&quot;, we&#8217;ve got &quot;blokes&quot;<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; blokes = pokes.; bloggers = buggers or buggurs &#8211;&nbsp; You pick &#8217;em.<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; A question for the ladies here: do you have sexual thoughts as you gaze upon this scene?<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; Do you Boris?<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; I have no sexual thoughts, really<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; They are a distant memory<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; More like a memory of a memory<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; but you are thinking about the ladies having these thoughts<br \/>\nBorisJohnson:&nbsp; Yes, but that is a clinical sort of question<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; ask your johnson<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; Luke come back&#8230;.<br \/>\nguest42:&nbsp; we&#8217;re floundering here<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; Luke, finish your chores!<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; 96<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; oy<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; i need sleep<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; There will be time enough for sleep in the grave<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; Rather than sleep, why not do a mitzvah?<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; a youngster like you<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; needs his booty sleep<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; sleeping is a mitzvah<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; mitzvah night<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; Rebbe!<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; Give me a brocha please<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; Help me break my addiction to the room<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; It is taking me away frim doing mitzvot<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; Rabbi, I need your fundraising guidance to help me bring this vulnerable young shiksa to LA for enlightenment and stuff<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; lotsa &quot;stuff&quot;<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; have her sell a horse<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; she did already<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; it was half dead<br \/>\nguest64:&nbsp; Nice chair<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; maybe I could my honor on Ebay?<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; sell your backyard tanning salon<br \/>\nzerox:&nbsp; how is earth today<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; hi<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; blue<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; and there&#8217;s nothing i can do<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; fill me up buttercup<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; don&#8217;t let me down<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; i&#8217;d rather have a reeses penut butter cup<br \/>\nzerox:&nbsp; no emma<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; she needs her booty sleep<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; emma has left ground control<br \/>\nzerox:&nbsp; ah sleep <br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; mounds or almond joy ??<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; some times you feel like a nut&#8230;<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; sometimes you don&#8217;t<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; ginger or maryann??<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; mounds<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; large mounds with nuts ???<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; lot of joy<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; Luke, come out come out wherever you are<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; We&#8217;ll count to 10<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; thats about how long you should last<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; his green tea makes him last alot longer<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; women can shave their legs and pits to be attractive to their husbands<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; Of course, and they had better<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; Women who fail to make themselves appealing are committing a sin<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; men can remain the pigs they are<br \/>\nRabbiChaimSeidlerFeller:&nbsp; luke &#8212; is she going to convert?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; Yes rabbi<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I&#8217;ll need your help there too<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I need you more than anyone<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; convert my ass<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; big job<br \/>\nRabbiChaimSeidlerFeller:&nbsp; i&#8217;ll convert her alright<br \/>\nRabbiChaimSeidlerFeller:&nbsp; once you go feller, you never go back<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; It saddens me that Luke was never able to find himself a proper Jewish bride<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; if she was chinese she would be converted rice<br \/>\nguest14:&nbsp; But I suppose that Jewish women are too picky these days<br \/>\nguest2:&nbsp; cuz his nose hair is unappealing<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; mitzvah gedolah leheyot betulah tamid (breslov)<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I captured her during an online war, rabbi, so first I&#8217;ll have to shave her head and let her mourn for her family for a month<br \/>\nguest66:&nbsp; i will sit shivah<\/p>\n<p><!--adsense--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From my live cam chat: Emma:&nbsp; You know&#8230;. Emma:&nbsp; I think its time for a trim YourMoralLeader:&nbsp; trim of what? Emma:&nbsp; Of&#8230; Emma:&nbsp; Your&#8230; Emma:&nbsp; Beard&#8230;&#8230;.. YourMoralLeader:&nbsp; charisma? Emma:&nbsp; lol YourMoralLeader:&nbsp; I&#8217;d lose my moral strength YourMoralLeader:&nbsp; like samson Emma:&nbsp; &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2871\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[6352,1401,6297,6356,6354,6357,30472,6348,6355,6353,4407,2279,897,902,6350,647,30324,700,6349,6351],"class_list":["post-2871","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-admin-user","tag-beard","tag-boss","tag-broadcaster","tag-california-vacation","tag-charisma","tag-emma","tag-feast-of-weeks","tag-hairs","tag-jewish-calendar","tag-kindness","tag-lass","tag-live-cam-chat","tag-lol","tag-moral-strength","tag-nbsp","tag-passover","tag-rabbi","tag-sefira","tag-shavuot"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.10 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"From my live cam chat: Emma: You know.... 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