{"id":2804,"date":"2008-04-23T12:31:41","date_gmt":"2008-04-23T20:31:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2804"},"modified":"2008-04-23T13:44:51","modified_gmt":"2008-04-23T21:44:51","slug":"which-woman-will-be-the-first-to-invite-lukes-jackbooted-aryan-sperm-into-her-uterus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2804","title":{"rendered":"Which woman will be the first to invite Luke’s jackbooted Aryan sperm into her uterus?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Join the fun<\/a>:<\/p>\n

palestine4ever:  I do notice he’s changing shirts more often.
\nEmma:  The less a girl knows him?
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke knows that he can use a petroleum based lubricant on his condoms, thereby assuring their failure during coitus
\npalestine4ever:  Has he discussed his vaginophobia with you, Emma?
\nYourMoralLeader:  oy
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke, Holly Randall WANTS your seed.
\npalestine4ever:  These are important things for couples to talk about.
\nYourMoralLeader:  we only talk about god and stuff
\npalestine4ever:  oy?
\nChaimAmalek:  He has no such fear, that was a bit that I made up and emailed to him that he posted under his name.
\nYourMoralLeader:  goy
\npalestine4ever:  I mean, it’s easy to get Yiddish and skinhead language confused
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly is feeling the march of time
\npalestine4ever:  But it could save you some trouble if you ever do time
\npalestine4ever:  Holly still communicates with him, which I find odd
\nChaimAmalek:  She years for Luke’s jack-booted sperm to storm their way into her uterus, planting the flag of Aryan Manhood into her ovum.
\npalestine4ever:  But then I’ve known girls whose best friends are made up entirely of men who they have once pleasured but no longer do
\nQuixoticLass:  lovely
\nChaimAmalek:  She is getting guidance from her father.
\nEmma:  mm
\npalestine4ever:  "the flag of Aryan Manhood" = lol
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke is an Aryan.  I am a semite.
\nChaimAmalek:  I have never been able to use my rod to direct women to Judaism.
\nQuixoticLass:  Judaism already has very attractive women
\npalestine4ever:  name the most famous converts to Islam?
\npalestine4ever:  Queen Noor = babe
\nChaimAmalek:  The Torah does not discriminate on the basis of a woman’s looks
\npalestine4ever:  Arafat’s wife = babe
\npalestine4ever:  Cat Stevens = okay, he’s a troll, but he had groupies who were cute
\nChaimAmalek:  What about Barak Obama’s wife?
\nChavi:  You people forget that I have a job \ud83d\ude42
\nYourMoralLeader:  We’ve missed you
\nYourMoralLeader:  Job, what’s that?
\nYourMoralLeader:  did you find a seder?
\nEmma:  Hi Chavi
\npalestine4ever:  speak of the Gollum
\nChaimAmalek:  Might you be interested in being the first to bear Luke’s child?
\nChavi:  Yup! Ended up at an Orthodox seder
\nYourMoralLeader:  sheesh
\nYourMoralLeader:  how was it?
\nYourMoralLeader:  was it long and hard?
\nChavi:  After spending the weekend with my friend and her kids, no children, no children EVER! \ud83d\ude42
\nChavi:  It was actually pretty awesome — but yes, it lasted about 5 hours
\npalestine4ever:  Luke, Luke, Luke
\nChavi:  And we weren’t even plastered
\nChaimAmalek:  Which woman will be the first to invite Luke’s jackbooted Aryan sperm into her uterus?
\npalestine4ever:  I’ve seen the picture with Kiki. Long and hard do not come to mind
\nYourMoralLeader:  headline
\nChavi:  Emma the She-Man?
\npalestine4ever:  CATFIGHT IN THE CONVERTED JEW’S ROOM
\nEmma:  What?
\nChaimAmalek:  No, Holly Randall
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly is the one with the inside track.  Plus, she’s a short drive away.
\nEmma:  hmmm
\npalestine4ever:  Chaim is taking bets since he’s got Hassid mafia connections
\nChaimAmalek:  And she’s nearing thirty.
\nChavi:  Everyone having an easy pesach?
\nChaimAmalek:  HOLLY RANDALL WANTS A BABY
\nChavi:  Noshing lotsa matzo?
\nChaimAmalek:  Mine is super easy
\nEmma:  She man?
\nEmma:  lol
\npalestine4ever:  What did I say?
\npalestine4ever:  WHAT DID I SAY?
\nQuixoticLass:  She-ra
\nYourMoralLeader:  I think she meant that as a compliment, Emma. I hope so.
\nChaimAmalek:  I’m more woman than man
\npalestine4ever:  palestine4ever = PROPHET
\nChaimAmalek:  My petzel gets smaller with every monty.
\nChaimAmalek:  month
\npalestine4ever:  This one has too much angst to be a good convert.
\npalestine4ever:  You want the ones that look good and walk four steps behind their man.
\nChaimAmalek:  Some days it seems my member has inverted in on itself
\npalestine4ever:  I’m a liberated guy myself
\npalestine4ever:  but it’s indisputed that it works
\nChavi:  Angst?
\nChavi:  You’re not talking about me, are you?
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke, if Holly appeared at the Hovel and demanded procreative sex from you, would you turn her down?
\nChaimAmalek:  I say not.
\nEmma:  Chavi… she man?
\npalestine4ever:  Yes, you, angsty convert.
\nChavi:  HA!
\nEmma:  Didnt you notice I was here?
\nChaimAmalek:  Stop biting one another like this.
\nChavi:  Chomp
\nChavi:  Chopm
\nChavi:  Chomp
\npalestine4ever:  Of course he wouldn’t
\nChavi:  Pac-man style
\nChaimAmalek:  Remember – eggs are expensive, sperm is cheap, and there is plenty of the latter to go around
\nChavi:  You know the interesting thing about the seder I was at
\nChavi:  is that many of those at the table were men
\nChavi:  in their 40s\/50s
\nChaimAmalek:  Losers
\nChavi:  all single and some divorced
\nChavi:  Imagine that
\nChaimAmalek:  Double losers
\nChavi:  So many lonely men
\npalestine4ever:  That’s interesting but hardly surprising.
\nChavi:  And they can’t find any women
\nYourMoralLeader:  Chavi, what did you mean by calling Emma a "she-man"?
\nChavi:  WHY oh WHY?
\npalestine4ever:  It’s a dying religion.
\nQuixoticLass:  because they’ve forgotten the value of bathing
\npalestine4ever:  Your future is the enthusiastic but vapid rumblings of your average shiny happy Hillel student.
\nChaimAmalek:  I wish to abort this invidious conversation by discussing instead the murder rate amongst the colored of Chicago
\nCarlNKarcher:  It’s not a dying religion. People are marrying late if they are marrying at all.
\nChaimAmalek:  That makes it dying
\npalestine4ever:  Preach it, Chaim.
\nChaimAmalek:  The future belongs to the young and the fecund
\nChavi:  I was being snarky. Has anyone ever met Emma? Her photo looks like such a typical MySpace photo that could have been pulled from anywhere!
\nChavi:  Call me a skeptic \ud83d\ude42
\nEmma:  Whoa hello i am here Chavi
\nEmma:  lol
\nYourMoralLeader:  Oy ve! Chavi
\nEmma:  Gee Wizz
\nChavi:  \ud83d\ude42
\nYourMoralLeader:  I have seen Emma on her cam. She is all woman.
\nEmma:  Someone dosn’t like me
\nChaimAmalek:  Hence we see the death of Italy and much of the rest of Christian Europe, as they are replaced by fecund Muslims from Africa and Pakistan
\nCarlNKarcher:  Chaim, the MOs and the Litvoks are reproducing themselves with vigor.
\nChavi:  I’ve just run into a lot of … fake people on the interweb lately
\nChavi:  LOL OMFG
\nQuixoticLass:  according to Elliot Dorph, you should get married early, have lots of kids
\nQuixoticLass:  or is it Dorff?
\nCarlNKarcher:  Why lots?
\nQuixoticLass:  Dorff
\nChaimAmalek:  Yes, but not the rest of Jewish world, and certainly not White America
\npalestine4ever:  America is destined to be a new Brazil, with little Aryan pockets here and there.
\nQuixoticLass:  to make up for those who don’t
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly Randall knows this in her heart
\nQuixoticLass:  So I did that
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke, give Holly a call right now
\nCarlNKarcher:  I think we aren’t getting married becauuse we are unusally rough on one another.
\nChaimAmalek:  Tell her to come to this cam now and I will talk her into having procreative sex with you
\nCarlNKarcher:  The singles’ scene in the Jewish world is horribly cruel.
\nChaimAmalek:  Don’t wast another of her good Aryan eggs.
\nChavi:  Be back. Need to restart the computer.
\nChavi:  Have fun, kids.
\nUser Chavi left the room.
\nChaimAmalek:  CarlnK, tell us something we don’t know.
\npalestine4ever:  Luke had it all
\nChaimAmalek:  It is doomed to fail, as it arises after when people should mate off
\nCarlNKarcher:  Gravity was invented by the Chinese.
\nCarlNKarcher:  How is that?
\npalestine4ever:  He could have been a great enabler for her addictions rather than recoiled from them
\npalestine4ever:  After seven years, he still doesn’t know how to be a suitcase pimp.
\nUser guest17 left the room.
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke has free access to Holly’s womb.  And she is used to the idea of a woman supporting her neerdowell "writer" of a husband
\nCarlNKarcher:  Chaim…..were you raised in the Yeshivish velt?
\npalestine4ever:  She’d work while he could sit at home on cam all day
\nChaimAmalek:  I am a product of Telshe Yeshiva
\npalestine4ever:  I don’t think so, Chaim.
\nChaimAmalek:  Indirectly
\nCarlNKarcher:  Chaim…so you gonna do any Mussar on us?
\nChaimAmalek:  I have been doing this all along
\nYourMoralLeader:  Who wants my seed?
\npalestine4ever:  Emma doesn’t talk much.
\nEmma:  hello!
\npalestine4ever:  Hi!
\nChaimAmalek:  Today, Luke Ford must call Holly Randal and invite her over
\npalestine4ever:  That’s better.
\npalestine4ever:  \ud83d\ude42
\nQuixoticLass:  emma talks when she has something to say
\npalestine4ever:  And what of you, QuixoticLass?
\nChaimAmalek:  After he has impregnated her, he can invite Emma over and repeat.
\nCarlNKarcher:  I didn’t know Emma had so many representatives.
\nYourMoralLeader:  lol
\nQuixoticLass:  you people just have diahrea of the hands
\nChaimAmalek:  QuixoticLass, if you are female, are you fertile?  Maybe you can squeeze another one out for the team?
\npalestine4ever:  How do you fit into our plans to Secure an Income for Luke Ford and a Future for his Unborn Children?
\nQuixoticLass:  I’ve squeezed out 4 already
\nEmma:  lol
\nQuixoticLass:  that is sufficient
\nChaimAmalek:  Then a fifth one is just a 25% change for you
\nChaimAmalek:  Just look at that goyishe punim.  How could you say no?
\nQuixoticLass:  well, I’m working on the income, but the kids are his problem
\nPostIronic:  I want to refinance my home mortgage now, where o’ where shall I find guidance?
\nChaimAmalek:  Emma, how many white babies are you willing to commit to making?
\nUser frodo left the room.
\nEmma:  1 or 2… or 8
\nChaimAmalek:  8!
\npalestine4ever:  I don’t know but Spruce Industries has great cleaning products, PostIronic.
\nChaimAmalek:  This one is a keeper.
\nQuixoticLass:  I’d sell an egg and rent my incubator for 40K
\nChaimAmalek:  After you impregnate Holly and break up with her again, hook up with Emma.
\nEmma:  lol
\npalestine4ever:  QuixoticLass: SOLD!
\nQuixoticLass:  hahaha
\nChaimAmalek:  Emma, if he won’t, I will.  Or I would if I could
\nEmma:  Ok Chaim
\nQuixoticLass:  plus maternity clothes, I must be well dressed
\nChaimAmalek:  All the time that you ladies spend here when you could be pregnant upsets me
\nPostIronic:  Do you have a girl friend Chaim?
\nChaimAmalek:  Absolutely not
\nPostIronic:  or wife?
\nChaimAmalek:  Nope
\nUser guest19 left the room.
\nQuixoticLass:  I’ve been pregnant for 3 years of my life, no one should have to endure that
\nUser guest18 left the room.
\nPostIronic:  been divorced?
\npalestine4ever:  hahahahaha
\nChaimAmalek:  QC, I would if I could, but I cannot.  If not you, then whom?
\nChaimAmalek:  I am really a virgin.
\nChaimAmalek:  Never been with a woman
\nPostIronic:  Are you really a female?
\nChaimAmalek:  Who?
\nPostIronic:  Chiam?
\npalestine4ever:  facepalm.jpg
\nChaimAmalek:  Might be.
\nChaimAmalek:  Sometimes I feel like a woman…..weepy, depressed, thinking of voting for democrats
\nPostIronic:  ChaimAmalek, are you really Luke’s wife?
\npalestine4ever:  Vote Alan Keyes
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke and I are as close as lips and teeth
\nChaimAmalek:  When Luke sexes Holly, I feel that i am right there
\nPostIronic:  Well, you can’t be the same person, since he is not typing and you are.  So not a fancy web ventrilloquist…
\nChaimAmalek:  ha ha
\nYourMoralLeader:  Post, how were your seders?
\nChaimAmalek:  naive you folks are
\npalestine4ever:  Especially when he blogs about it during the act.
\nPostIronic:  The second night seder was surreal.
\nYourMoralLeader:  How so?
\npalestine4ever:  Chaim is the Eliza of Luke’s life.
\nChavi:  So I’m trying to figure out
\nChaimAmalek:  Why can’t they invent a flexible matzo?
\nChavi:  Why is it that you post all the chats on your web site?
\nEmma:  Its fun to read after
\nYourMoralLeader:  just the good bits
\nChavi:  Chaim — Flexible matzo = matzo + water
\npalestine4ever:  Because he’s earning a living one click on a compost ad at a time.
\nChaimAmalek:  not soggy, flexible
\nChavi:  But the point is for it to be miserable to spread Temp Tee on!
\nYourMoralLeader:  what’s that?
\nChavi:  Temp Tee = breakstone’s brand of whipped cream cheese
\nChaimAmalek:  I have boxes of Tam Tams to sell.
\nEmma:  Tam tams?
\npalestine4ever:  It occurs to me that just about every question in this room can be answered with the phrase "Some crazy Jew thing."
\nPostIronic:  The hosts were lovely. Their apartment was small. The restroom was in the hallway, four feet from the dining room. I let go a loud shofar-like fart. Followed by stacato accents… pa rum rum rum rum , eya eya eya…
\nChaimAmalek:  Jewish tampons for the desicated
\nChavi:  Tam Tams, alas, weren’t made Kosher l’pesach this year
\nYourMoralLeader:  charming, Post
\nEmma:  aha
\nPostIronic:  I had to violate the hog and turn on the fan.
\nQuixoticLass:  most pesach products are just matza in different sizes
\nChaimAmalek:  Why must Jews so often be so vulgar?
\npalestine4ever:  I’m shocked and appalled.
\nQuixoticLass:  "violate the hog" hahahahaha
\nChavi:  You guys are a lot more vulgar than any jews I know \ud83d\ude42
\npalestine4ever:  And I mean, I grew up with relatives buggering the family pets.
\nPostIronic:  They were laughing, but when I got outside they were the perfect polite company. all straight faced.
\nChavi:  Mazel tov on that one
\nQuixoticLass:  please, do not violate the hog!
\nYourMoralLeader:  Post, how about the first night seder?
\nYourMoralLeader:  Did the bad man touch you?
\npalestine4ever:  Point it out on the doll
\nPostIronic:  I blame the "sandwich" we had to eat of schmura matza
\nPostIronic:  it was hard to get down, as we had the special $20 a slice sephardic soft matza…
\nPostIronic:  flown in from NJ overnight post
\nChavi:  Oh man … I got a box of shmura matzo free at the shul on Friday
\nChavi:  It tasted like tortilla chips
\npalestine4ever:  No way
\nChavi:  Way
\nQuixoticLass:  I spent $20 on matza this year
\npalestine4ever:  You did not.
\nChavi:  yikes
\nPostIronic:  Oh, tortilla chips don’t have a mitzva
\nPostIronic:  I spent $20 on matza
\nChaimAmalek:  Emma, what has any of this to do with horses?  Nothing.
\nPostIronic:  handmade
\nQuixoticLass:  that was for 10 boxes
\npalestine4ever:  I’m pretty sure giving it away violates some bit of Torah.
\nChavi:  why did you need 10 boxes of matzo?
\nCarlNKarcher:  http:\/\/www.jewishinstlouis.org\/page.html?ArticleID=137163
\npalestine4ever:  Exactly, let’s go back to Luke’s quest for normalhood
\nCarlNKarcher:  Check it out; I just got the link.
\nChaimAmalek:  I can smell Holly Randallll ovulating even from this distance.
\nQuixoticLass:  8 days of Pesach + 4 kids = need a whole lotta matza
\nPostIronic:  One box of matza, pizza size
\nChaimAmalek:  QC, where do youlive?
\nQuixoticLass:  who is QC?
\nChaimAmalek:  you
\nQuixoticLass:  I’m QL
\nPostIronic:  On the first night of Pesach, I tried to make a kosher le Pesach pizza
\npalestine4ever:  When Holly ovulates in California, there’s a monsoon killing orphans in Bangladesh
\nYourMoralLeader:  lol
\npalestine4ever:  It’s that powerful.
\nEmma:  lol omg
\npalestine4ever:  Luke, I will be frank with you.
\nChaimAmalek:  If Luke were a real man, he’d get in that damn vanofhis, drive over to her home, and plant the flag in her womb. That’s what I would do.
\npalestine4ever:  I’ve never had a woman that looks like Holly.
\npalestine4ever:  The chances of you ever getting that prize again are, I’m afraid, very remote.
\nChaimAmalek:  I met her once.  She is a real sweety
\npalestine4ever:  BUT
\npalestine4ever:  You don’t need to reinvent the wheel.
\nChavi:  I clicked away … but matzo pizza = my favorite thing
\nChavi:  I’ve had it for two meals already this week
\npalestine4ever:  Just swallow your pride, say some therapy brought out the best in you, and CALL HER NOW.
\nChaimAmalek:  She’s tall, blond, smart, physicall and mentally strong, good natured, has exactly the yiccus (family honor) that Luke needs
\nPostIronic:  I should have made quessadilas
\nChaimAmalek:  PLO, I agree
\nPostIronic:  Luke, that music sucks
\nChavi:  Ever done … JDate?
\nChaimAmalek:  horrors
\nChavi:  Matchmakers are big, you know
\nChavi:  Find yerself a yente
\npalestine4ever:  Thank you, JDL
\nChaimAmalek:  I’ve answered ads on Craigslist
\nYourMoralLeader:  yes, I went 0 for 120 in my month there last August
\nChavi:  I know two jews married after meeting on Craigslist
\nYourMoralLeader:  and I was on the cover of the Jewish Journal and still couldn’t hook up
\nChavi:  it can be done
\nChaimAmalek:  This is why I know Luke should have gone after Holly
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly has it all.
\nUser PostIronic left the room.
\nChavi:  Maybe people are intrigued by you and then come here and see your saucy mannerisms and run for the hills!
\nQuixoticLass:  do you think it had anything to do with what was written about you on the inside of the Jewish journal?<\/p>\n

alestine4ever:  And you’ll get Humphrey in the bargain
\npalestine4ever:  You two can go out and discuss your morals and ethics while your women are shooting porn
\nChaimAmalek:  Humphrey is like Luke, only older
\nPostIronic:  If the Jewish Journal won’t buy an ad on your blog, and you make their calendar girls squirm, it should be obvious that it’s not a win-win relationship
\nYourMoralLeader:  anyone here need SEO work or refinance?
\nPostIronic:  First night of Pesach I made dinner in my new apartment.
\nPostIronic:  the sink backed up.
\npalestine4ever:  Well, and he’s more sartorial, but that hardly needs to be mentioned
\nChavi:  You didn’t seder first night PostIronic?
\nChavi:  you missed a mitzvah!
\nPostIronic:  but I had a wonderful matzo ball soup
\npalestine4ever:  You have something more interesting to discuss, like matzo pizza?
\nChavi:  Kugel maybe?
\nPostIronic:  I don’t know how to make kugel
\nChavi:  It’s easy
\nChavi:  as
\nChavi:  YML getting laid
\nChavi:  HA!
\nPostIronic:  I refuse to use potato starch pasta
\nYourMoralLeader:  Post, you need to learn how to please a man
\nChavi:  but not
\nPostIronic:  I’m a man and I’m straight
\npalestine4ever:  I’ve been in this room 12000 times and I still have yet to hear you folks discussing your plans for ZOG
\nPostIronic:  You need to learn how to please a man
\npalestine4ever:  hahahaha
\npalestine4ever:  YML = GOD
\nPostIronic:  Can we have other music?
\nPostIronic:  God doesn’t listen to KLOS
\nPostIronic:  KLSX
\nChavi:  ZOG?
\nQuixoticLass:  God listens to Jack
\npalestine4ever:  If Allah created everything, then Allah has listened to everything
\npalestine4ever:  so yes Allah has listened to KLSX
\nYourMoralLeader:  Emma likes this song, so there
\npalestine4ever:  Yes, ZOG.
\nEmma:  \ud83d\ude42
\npalestine4ever:  You and Luke don’t get it but Chaim knows all of the handshakes.
\nPostIronic:  Emma, do you like the Go-Betweens from Australia?
\nPostIronic:  They are awesome
\nPostIronic:  Emma, what else do you like?
\nEmma:  def leppard
\nPostIronic:  The thing with Levi is that he will just play the same thing over and over again
\nEmma:  Only the good songs
\nChavi:  My fingers still smell like Garlic
\nChavi:  This is deeply distressing
\nEmma:  Oh dear
\nPostIronic:  ?
\nChavi:  Anyone know how to get garlic off the hands?
\nPostIronic:  Chavi
\npalestine4ever:  Soap.
\nPostIronic:  lemon juice
\nChavi:  I made Sephardic spicy fish last night … and it involved garlic
\nChavi:  I’ve seriously washed my hand 5 million times
\nPostIronic:  Yummy!
\nChavi:  The food was good. The smell on my hands? Not so much
\nQuixoticLass:  Post is right.  lemon juice
\nChavi:  What if I meet my beshert and he goes to kiss my hand
\nChavi:  and BAM! GARLIC!
\nPostIronic:  parsley oil will also get rid of garlic
\npalestine4ever:  Why do you eat Jewish food now that you’ve converted?
\nChavi:  I made the fish because it’s Pesach
\nQuixoticLass:  Chavi, any strong acid will do
\nChavi:  Hrm. Thanks, QL
\nChavi:  I will have to give this a go when I get home
\npalestine4ever:  I mean, it’s just food.
\nPostIronic:  Doesn’t look like I will be learning about how to refinance my mortgage now.
\npalestine4ever:  What if you’re an astronaut and have to eat from a tube?
\nChavi:  I’m not following …
\nChavi:  Are you offended that I sometimes eat "jewish" food?
\npalestine4ever:  Will Allah of Jahweh or G*d as some of you crazies call him hate you for drinking Tang?
\nPostIronic:  Fry’s electronics has astronaut food and I have to say the freezedried stuff is not bad
\nChavi:  I would hate me for drinking Tang
\nPostIronic:  Yay!
\nPostIronic:  Go-betweens!
\nChavi:  \ud83d\ude00
\npalestine4ever:  I’m offended by almost everything
\nQuixoticLass:  freezedried ice cream is yum
\nChavi:  I’ve had the freezdried ice cream
\nChavi:  Stuff is tasty!
\nPostIronic:  oh yes – freeze dried ice cream!!!
\npalestine4ever:  That’s almost a tolerable musical selection Luke
\nYourMoralLeader:  Post, don’t you have computer work to do? like making a 404 page for a friend?
\npalestine4ever:  HOLY s**t IT’S A CUP
\npalestine4ever:  WHEN DID LUKE START USING CUPS
\nQuixoticLass:  omg freeze dried dippin dots as a breakfast cereal…
\npalestine4ever:  I’M GONE FOR 2 WEEKS AND EVERYTHING GOES TO HELL
\nEmma:  lol
\nPostIronic:  I have to meet up with my dad right now in the valley. and hear about his mortgage refinance at e-loans
\nChavi:  swish
\nChavi:  swish
\nChavi:  swallow
\nPostIronic:  no thanks to RefinanceMortgageNow.net
\nUser QuixoticLass changed their name to ThanksForUsingAGlassYouCAveman.
\npalestine4ever:  LOL
\nEmma:  lol Lass
\npalestine4ever:  It’s a mug, even
\nThanksForUsingAGlassYouCAveman:  details…
\npalestine4ever:  This is a huge step up in Project: Educating Luke Ford
\nUser ThanksForUsingAGlassYouCAveman changed their name to QuixoticLass.
\nPostIronic:  that music is not erotic for me…
\nEmma:  Woop!
\npalestine4ever:  Okay, I’ve got some naming of the Jew to do
\nChavi:  dropping like flies they are!
\nPostIronic:  that music is crashing my browser…
\nPostIronic:  hint hint – we are exiting in droves
\nChaimAmalek:  AMALEK never leaves
\nChaimAmalek:  He is here in all of your hearts always
\nChaimAmalek:  He is immortal.
\nPostIronic:  Chaim how will Levi make some money and support as wife?
\nPostIronic:  Is it through the mortgage refinance industry?"
\nChaimAmalek:  who did we pick to be his wife?  If it is Holly, NO PROBLEM
\nChaimAmalek:  She is self supporting and used to the idea of a woman supporting her man
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly, if you are out there, will you marry me?
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke, how does this sound to you.  You get Emma, and I get Holly
\nPostIronic:  Well it should be someone in Wellness
\nPostIronic:  Levi is in Wellness
\nChaimAmalek:  That way, everyone is happy
\nPostIronic:  Is Holly in Wellness?
\nPostIronic:  Emma?  are you in the Wellness phase of your treatment?
\nYourMoralLeader:  hey, watch it Post
\nChaimAmalek:  What is all this wellness talk?  Sounds like an HMO
\nEmma:  Treatment?
\nPostIronic:  s a joke
\nEmma:  ok
\nChaimAmalek:  This chat thing does not let me go up and see the early stuff
\nChaimAmalek:  QL, if you no longer do procreative sex, does that mean that you are celibate?
\nChaimAmalek:  How do orthodox Jews work that?
\nPostIronic:  Why are you playing all of this seduction music and not Dennis Prager reruns??
\nEmma:  Chaim.. you seem to love the subject of sex even though you are post sexual
\nChaimAmalek:  Prager is a pansie.  Most of those conservative faux hawks are, you know
\nChaimAmalek:  Old men remember the dreams of their youth.
\nPostIronic:  maybe Prager was just a phase
\nChaimAmalek:  I can be limp as a noodle, but still rememberdreams of pretzel days
\nEmma:  lol
\nQuixoticLass:  I no longer date Orthodox men, apparently.
\nChaimAmalek:  My nickname was "Rolled Gold"
\nChaimAmalek:  (for the benefit of Emma, that’s the name of a brand of petzel snack)
\nEmma:  Gotcha \ud83d\ude09
\nChaimAmalek:  What sort of man do you date?
\nQuixoticLass:  they tend to label themselves "spiritual but not religious"
\nChaimAmalek:  Diamond dealers?  Bankers? 
\nPostIronic:  This is stripper music
\nQuixoticLass:  whatever that means
\nChaimAmalek:  Orthodox are religious but not spiritual
\nChaimAmalek:  Spiritual means "I am willing to have sex with you and then talk aobut it"
\nQuixoticLass:  I did date a diamond courier
\nEmma:  lol
\nQuixoticLass:  but not a dealer
\nChaimAmalek:  Is it true they hide their jewels in their private parts?
\nQuixoticLass:  i have a 2 felon limit, no dealers
\nChaimAmalek:  I want to marry Holly
\nChaimAmalek:  Luke, set her free for me
\nPostIronic:  Have you bought her a ring?
\nChaimAmalek:  If she sees you marry Emma and move to Ireland, then maybe I got a chance
\nQuixoticLass:  no they do not hide them in their private parts
\nQuixoticLass:  they carry guns, big ones
\nEmma:  lol
\nPostIronic:  Emma, have you gotten a marriage proposal before?
\nChaimAmalek:  I wish I carried a big gun
\nEmma:  Nothing serious
\nQuixoticLass:  most men do, chaim, you’re not alone
\nPostIronic:  Has anyone who has proposed marriage offered to support you?
\nEmma:  No..
\nChaimAmalek:  I have heard that Luke is well armed
\nChaimAmalek:  If I had large shvanze, bidde bidde biddebum, I wouldn’t have to work hard, bidde bidde bidde bidde bum
\nPostIronic:  I’m hungry dammit!
\nChaimAmalek:  All day long I’d blog, and women would say "Pardon me, rev Chaim"
\nPostIronic:  hungry!!!
\nChaimAmalek:  Small penises are half the reason why white men go after Asiatic women
\nChaimAmalek:  The others being their look and character and values
\nChaimAmalek:  I’ve never even gone yellow.
\nChaimAmalek:  QL, have you ever miscegenated?
\nChaimAmalek:  Has anyone here every miscegenated?
\nPostIronic:  so small penis = asian wife?
\nQuixoticLass:  my kids all look like me, you’ll never know
\nChaimAmalek:  Half the time, this is what men are thinking.  "My penis is too small to please the sex in the city watching white woman, so I will find a smaller aSian woman"
\nChaimAmalek:  That’s why Holly hit it off with Luke.
\nPostIronic:  what about kimora simmons (russell simons)
\nChaimAmalek:  Each was right sized for the other.
\nPostIronic:  http:\/\/images.google.com\/images?hl=en&resnum=0&q=kimora+simmons&um=1&ie=UTF-8
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  ok luke .. I have to be honest .. the only reason I come to this site . its that your beard … I need to check back on it.. being a man of grizzled stubble myself!
\nPostIronic:  YAY!!!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  you should change the name of this site .. to LukeBeardwatch.com
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  btw .. since KarkKarcher is online .. is there a free burger in this crap! \ud83d\ude42
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  interest rates are going down!  … r u high? \ud83d\ude09
\nChavi:  What’d I miss …
\nEmma:  Not much Chavi
\nChavi:  Phew
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  what is this an infomerical! .. stop luke .. we want porn and blogging!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  this is not the wall street journal report! \ud83d\ude42
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  lol
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  comedy is my real talent!
\nYourMoralLeader:  http:\/\/refinancemortgagenow.net\/blog\/
\nYourMoralLeader:  here’s my baby
\nPostIronic:  woo hoo!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  f that .. we want porn and blogging . get back to what you do well! \ud83d\ude42
\nPostIronic:  yes!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  yes .. can I borrow a million dollars interest free .. I promise I’ll pay it back! .. really I promise!
\nPostIronic:  tell me about e-loans vs. countrywide
\nPostIronic:  well……
\nPostIronic:  heh
\nPostIronic:  ok – i have to go to the valley
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  moral leader .. do you have 2 italian guys name vinnie and guido wokring for your new loan op?
\nChavi:  so …
\nChavi:  what’s up with the commercial stuff here?
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  what kind of freak’n football is that? ..
\nChavi:  i mean, as much as i like listening to luke talk …
\nChaimAmalek:  The irony is that unless he marries into money, Luke will never be in any position to buy a house.
\nChaimAmalek:  Only HOLLY RANDAL can save Luke from this grim fait!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  bank robbing is always an option!
\nChavi:  ha ha ha, Chaim
\nChavi:  You know, people are burning down their houses a lot these days because of the mortgage crisis
\nChaimAmalek:  HOLLY RANDALLLLL is the cure to all that ails Luke
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  sugermommas.com …  luke’s next big web adventure!
\nChavi:  okay
\nChavi:  i’m leaving
\nChavi:  ta ta, y’all!
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  fyi … luke you should hook up with my boyfriend .. Yanni Raz mortage broker ..
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  can u spare a dime brother!  ..  GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!  .. (she’s not a human being!)
\nChaimAmalek:  He will end up like . . . . . . .
\nChaimAmalek:  sad
\nChaimAmalek:  so sad
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  money.. money.. money .. honey…. 
\nChaimAmalek:  Best thing that could happen to Luke right now is this:
\nChaimAmalek:  Holly does an intervention, bursting into his home wth some Mexicans
\nChaimAmalek:  They scoop up his few valuables, carry them into her waiting Escalade.
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  best thing that could happen to luke right now .. is THREE words .. RAZOR .. SHAVING CREAM!
\nChaimAmalek:  Then they chloroform Luke, ala "The Case of the Manicled Mormon"  (Google it)
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  ROCK AND ROLL CHOOOCEEE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
\nChaimAmalek:  He awakens in her home, with Holly standing over his head demanding his sperm
\nChaimAmalek:  He agrees, marries her, and that’s that
\nEmma:  scary
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  LUKESPERMDONATION.COM .. THE NEXT BIG NET WINNER!
\nChaimAmalek:  Then just to guard against backsliding, they burn down his hovel
\nChaimAmalek:  And torch his van
\nChaimAmalek:  So luke is totally dependent on Holly for housing, food, and sex.
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  burn the hovel .. burn it down .. burn the whole damn thing back down! (repeat verse!)
\nChaimAmalek:  Everyone knows I’m right about this. 
\nChaimAmalek:  Even Emma can see the logic.
\nChaimAmalek:  Emma, your only hope is to appear at his door with three stout Irish lads to kidnap Luke for yourself.
\nft the room.
\nChaimAmalek:  So luke is totally dependent on Holly for housing, food, and sex.
\nMirthalaVillaSalinasNunez:  burn the hovel .. burn it down .. burn the whole damn thing back down! (repeat verse!)
\nChaimAmalek:  Everyone knows I’m right about this. 
\nUser Emma left the room.
\nChaimAmalek:  Even Emma can see the logic.
\nUser Emma (84.68.234.17) entered the room.
\nChaimAmalek:  Emma, your only hope is to appear at his door with three stout Irish lads to kidnap Luke for yourself.
\nChaimAmalek:  Just google "The Case of the Manacled Mormon" to read about the condign fate that Luke needs
\nEmma:  blah
\nYourMoralLeader:  You guys are weirding Emma out and she’s the reason people come here.
\nChaimAmalek:  yeah that suggests a new line of business.
\nChaimAmalek:  Renting hot chix to appear in chat rooms to attract the nerds
\nChaimAmalek:  ALso, what is QL, chopped liver?
\nChaimAmalek:  I wish Holly were here. <\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Join the fun: palestine4ever:  I do notice he’s changing shirts more often. Emma:  The less a girl knows him? ChaimAmalek:  Luke knows that he can use a petroleum based lubricant on his condoms, thereby assuring their failure during coitus palestine4ever:  … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[5602,5595,5597,4641,5592,5593,29948,5601,29773,902,5600,5599,5594,5598,1208,5591,5596,3254,29981,5603],"class_list":["post-2804","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-arafat","tag-attractive-women","tag-cat-stevens","tag-condoms","tag-converts-to-islam","tag-famous-converts-to-islam","tag-holly-randall","tag-important-things","tag-judaism","tag-lol","tag-lubricant","tag-manhood","tag-march-of-time","tag-ovum","tag-oy","tag-queen-noor","tag-semite","tag-sperm","tag-torah","tag-uterus"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2804","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2804"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2804\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2804"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2804"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2804"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}