{"id":2759,"date":"2008-04-16T07:10:18","date_gmt":"2008-04-16T15:10:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2759"},"modified":"2008-04-16T11:29:07","modified_gmt":"2008-04-16T19:29:07","slug":"im-live-on-my-cam-15","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2759","title":{"rendered":"I’m Live On My Cam!"},"content":{"rendered":"

Click here<\/a> to join the fun!<\/p>\n

Emma:  Burt.. Lukes first book is amazing get it!
\nStuntmanBurt:  What’s it about?
\nGina:  He is now working on one about this chatroom
\nYourMoralLeader:  A Rebel Without A Shul
\nGina:  Luke joins the Hungarian Mafia
\nYourMoralLeader:  r u taking me to lunch, gina?
\nGina:  I thought we could dine in the back yard while tanning
\nYourMoralLeader:  I’ll prepare something tasty
\nYourMoralLeader:  and we’ll talk about emma!
\nGina:  I’ll put on my french maids uniform and help clean the hovel Thursday eve
\nGina:  get the cometz out of all your cracks
\nGina:  Starbucks or CBTL
\nGina:  no refills!
\nGina:  I’m getting away cheap
\nGina:  for the pleasure of your company
\nGina:  I might even throw in a danish
\nGina:  or a tart
\nGina:  practice for Emma
\nGina:  you could try out all your best lines
\nGina:  I’ll let you know what works
\nwatchingyoublog:  is that your belly?
\nwatchingyoublog:  let’s get a profile view again
\nwatchingyoublog:  did you see the oprah special on the pregnant man?
\nChaimAmalek:  If you wish to marry, you should secrete yourself in a yeshiva in Israel, one of the orthodox ones
\nChaimAmalek:  For me to emulate you, I must win $500,000,000 in the lotto.
\nChaimAmalek:  Hashem darn it, you should write a book.
\nYourMoralLeader:  maybe a novel
\nChaimAmalek:  "The Poor Man’s Guide to Romancing Hot Women in LA"
\nChaimAmalek:  You don’t have the patience to write a novel
\nChaimAmalek:  You can’t create a novel out of massive blocks of quotes, the way you can make a book out of interviews.
\nChaimAmalek:  The only Californian I can think of who has managed to do what you are doing is Charlie Manson but he’s in jail
\nChaimAmalek:  To what do you credit your new success?
\nChaimAmalek:  A new perfume?  Clothes? The beard?
\nChaimAmalek:  Or is it the will of God above that you have such success?
\nChaimAmalek:  I will now take your questions.
\nChaimAmalek:  Who wants to get into Luke’s new Mitzvah Tank, or have I let the cat out of the bag?
\nChaimAmalek:  I applaud Luke on getting Chabad to spring for the conversion of his van into a Mitzvah Tank.
\nChaimAmalek:  I myself am working on a trailor attachment that would house a mikvah for Jewish women.
\nChaimAmalek:  These enhancements to Luke’s mode of transport can only hasten the arrival of the Messiah.
\nChaimAmalek: Sex with beautiful women is better than any psychotropic drug, better than spending any number of hours with a shrink (unless she is good in the sack); and is its own viagra.
\nChaimAmalek: I need to know: give me the hour, how long, I want to calculate the refractory period.
\nYourMoralLeader: don’t take any artificial stimulants
\nChaimAmalek: Start up a religion
\nChaimAmalek: Take concubines.  Have your own compound.
\nChaimAmalek: I say you try to do big business deals today.
\nChaimAmalek: Jewish women are weeping, of course.
\nChaimAmalek: I envy you. But also, and this is not a joke, there is no reason for you to marry.  It just would not work out for your wife, unless she were in your trade.
\nChaimAmalek: You have no inducment for it anyway.
\nYourMoralLeader: what trade am I in?
\nChaimAmalek: Blogging for sex
\nYourMoralLeader: oh
\nYourMoralLeader: that doesn’t sound nice
\nChaimAmalek: I meant porn, but you are not quite in that
\nChaimAmalek: Still, you have too many opportunities to be unfaithful to be faithful
\nChaimAmalek: If you marry, you should find yourself a bisexual woman who will approve and maybe join in.
\nChaimAmalek: I am not talking about love here
\nChaimAmalek: You have too many opportunities.
\nChaimAmalek: You know I’m right about this.
\nChaimAmalek: I am not blaming you. I would do likewise.
\nChaimAmalek: That you can do this with your resources in extraordinary.  Why marry?
\nChaimAmalek: But you would be happier if you disabused yourself of the notinon that you are ever going to marry a real Jewish woman in a shul with all of your Jewish friends present, and then have Jewish kids who become members in good standing of the Jewish community
\nChaimAmalek: That is not in the cards.  As I put it, the Shiksa Menace
\nChaimAmalek: Why commit to a lifetime of eating dunkin donuts when you have access to all those kitchens?
\nChaimAmalek: Lousy metaphore but you get the idea
\nChaimAmalek: ie, why buy a cow when you have free access to the teats of a hundred cows.
\nChaimAmalek: You are not going to marry.
\nChaimAmalek: Satan has you by the balls, and you like it.
\nChaimAmalek: I, meanwhile, cannot even get a date off of Craigslist.
\nChaimAmalek: Face it: you don’t find Jewish women all that attractive.
\nChaimAmalek: By the way, I’ll bet Aria is around 1\/256th negro.  As Dr. Pierce has noted, the Portuguese have a lot of negro blood in them.
\nChaimAmalek: 18 and Irish is dangerous.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Click here to join the fun! Emma:  Burt.. Lukes first book is amazing get it! StuntmanBurt:  What’s it about? Gina:  He is now working on one about this chatroom YourMoralLeader:  A Rebel Without A Shul Gina:  Luke joins the Hungarian … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[4831,5134,5127,5136,30472,5126,5132,824,5104,29962,5130,5128,30891,5129,2873,5131,5133,671,800,29806],"class_list":["post-2759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-back-yard","tag-californian","tag-charlie-manson","tag-cracks","tag-emma","tag-french-maids-uniform","tag-hot-women","tag-hovel","tag-hungarian","tag-mafia","tag-massive-blocks","tag-new-perfume","tag-oprah","tag-pleasure-of-your-company","tag-poor-man","tag-pregnant-man","tag-profile-view","tag-shul","tag-starbucks","tag-yeshiva"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t