{"id":2627,"date":"2008-04-02T08:54:55","date_gmt":"2008-04-02T16:54:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2627"},"modified":"2008-04-02T17:42:15","modified_gmt":"2008-04-03T01:42:15","slug":"im-live-on-my-cam-and-practicing-my-kiddush","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2627","title":{"rendered":"I&#8217;m Live On My Cam And Practicing My Kiddush"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I have severe kiddush performance anxiety syndrome.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/yourmoralleader.camstreams.com\/\">Click here<\/a> to join the conversation.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;m answering shailos and issuing teshuvos and bestowing semicha (rabbinic ordination) and converting goyim to Orthodox Judaism. All on my cam!<\/p>\n<p>All my decisions are honored by the RCC and the Chief Rabbinate of Israel.<\/p>\n<p>our latest disciple seeking to see how you&#8217;re going to Watch me wrap tefillin, study Torah and engineer sweeping moral change?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; yes<br \/>\nFarFromTheTruth:&nbsp; Not bad&#8230;&#8230;you&#8217;re offering personal tutorials&#8230;&#8230;!<br \/>\nInnocentHottie:&nbsp; Is this how guys live?<br \/>\nInnocentHottie:&nbsp; Looks depressing.<br \/>\nUser InnocentHottie changed their name to JudgeCrater.<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; A day in the life of . . . <br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; Are you writing any new books?<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; I just dropped a hundred bucks on Amazon<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; I wanted to buy some new Luke Ford books, but there weren&#8217;t any to be purchased.<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; no<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; I thought Jews serious about their faith declined to hear women sing.<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; Does not the sound of this woman&#8217;s voice inflame your male essence?<br \/>\nJudgeCrater:&nbsp; And if it does, how can you have holy thoughts?<\/p>\n<p>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; i just like to see him smiling<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; it&#8217;s like waiting for prince charming and only gettin luke ford<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; he looks like he has a good time in front of the cam<br \/>\nguest49:&nbsp; hiluke you look better without the beard!!!!<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; i think it&#8217;s his fetish<br \/>\nguest49:&nbsp; shave please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; the more people tuning in the more aroused he gets<br \/>\nguest49:&nbsp; LUKE&nbsp; willyou shave for fri then you can grow it back!!!!<br \/>\nguest49:&nbsp; im mee<br \/>\nUser guest49 changed their name to mee.<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; i&#8217;m me 2<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; will you??<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; 32 years of being me<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; you are keen mee!<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; am i ??<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; a compromise could be shaving his nether regions<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; yeah a good razor wouldnt go a miss lol<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; no risk at cutting of something big<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; tis the time of year where birds are looking for nests lol<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; how do you know FEEL?<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; know wot<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; yo<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; i like luke as he is!<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; yo yml<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; blimey he spoke<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; hehhe<br \/>\nRussianDragon:&nbsp; mm i think&nbsp; he&nbsp; looks more jewish with his beard<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; cutting something big FEEL<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; i wish mee lol<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; true russian<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; rap??? blimey<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; prefer the opera I think<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; MORAL!!!! are you going to shave?????<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; yeah YML, about time you shaved that beard off<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; xxxxxx<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; please<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; get ya dinner caught in it<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; why is it so important to you mee?<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; he taking the beard?<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; LUKE mee talking to you!!<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; MEE!!!!!!!<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; me talking to you!<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; cause he looks better without<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; i think so too<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; good<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; haha<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; he is his own master<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; arnt we all<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; yes we are<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; HE hasnt replyed to mee<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; he rarely speaks to anyone<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; more christmas -songs?<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; omg he spoke again<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; there you got your answer mee!<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; y is it against the torah<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; who me?<br \/>\nmee:&nbsp; can anyone hear him <br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; yup<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; me or mee<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; he just talked to you mee!<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; no to me<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; and me<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; or mee<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; i heard him say it<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; which me<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; meeeeeee<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; there is only one me<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; and that&#8217;s me<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; i am me too<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; no you are you<br \/>\nFEELtheFORCEluke:&nbsp; well I was until me showed up<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; aren`t we all?<br \/>\nguest51:&nbsp; i am me<br \/>\ncavaliera:&nbsp; hahaha<\/p>\n<p>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; confess, you sinners!<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; come to g-d right now!<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; so when do u plan to shave leader?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; whats that on ya head leader?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; 89 meet emma she&#8217;s a little slow but a heart of gold!!!<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; what did I miss?<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; any juicy gossip?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; where do i start the leader was just stood on his hands floating u missed it mate sorry!!<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; I&#8217;m waiting for another pants change&#8230;.<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; emmas waiting for that lol<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; emma has to get over there and pick them up off the floor!<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; now we&#8217;re going<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; oh yeah baby<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; the rooms moving finally!!!<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; now look what you made him do<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; 89 choked to much for him<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; ur fault<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; lol<br \/>\nEmma:&nbsp; hardly<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; you put em on backwards mate<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; thanks.. that answers the boxer \/ bvd question<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; speedo next?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; i think u had a lazy on there leader could you confirm?<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; true<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; thank emma<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; you had a lazy is that correct?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; a lazy lob-on<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; matzah doesn&#8217;t rise<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; u do this ever night?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; every<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; he doesn&#8217;t always change his pants<\/p>\n<p>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; what would you like me to do to you on shabbat 88?<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; make lots of kiddush<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; after kiddush<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; herring<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; where did you hide the afikomen?<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; too fishy&#8230;<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; with the rabbit<br \/>\nguest90:&nbsp; trying to find my piggy bank<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; its in the temple mount<br \/>\nYourMoralLeader:&nbsp; kadosh kadoshim<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; saying kiddush gets you in<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; is he cracking one off?<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; havdalah is good too<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; one off the wrist 90<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; in the kiddush cup<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; can&#8217;t stop laughing<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; his cup runneth over<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; lololol<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; ain&#8217;t laughed like this for ages<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; u hurting that bunny<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; the leader cracking one off the wrist right now show please keep the noise down<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; Emma is the queen <br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; cupping the bunny<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; bunny went to sleep<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; with emma<br \/>\nDoooDaaa:&nbsp; our fealess leader is having a seizer<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; off the wrist again,what stamina<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; energizer bunny<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; eveready!!!!<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; show us your grape juice<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; here we are wanting to talk to the big man and he&#8217;s on the phone??<br \/>\nguest92:&nbsp; was that moonshine?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; wow i&#8217;ve been here the longest<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; i&#8217;m at the summit<br \/>\nguest88:&nbsp; peaking?<br \/>\nguest92:&nbsp; you should get a prize<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; i&#8217;m going to send the leader a razor u think he&#8217;ll use it?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; before we start me an 88 want to check the bunny&#8217;s OK?<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; is he singing grand old duke of york??<br \/>\nWelshdragon:&nbsp; and when they were up they were up!!!<\/p>\n<p><!--adsense--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have severe kiddush performance anxiety syndrome. Click here to join the conversation. I&#8217;m answering shailos and issuing teshuvos and bestowing semicha (rabbinic ordination) and converting goyim to Orthodox Judaism. All on my cam! All my decisions are honored by &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=2627\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[3623,3624,3626,3627,829,3621,29771,1078,822,647,3625,2632,3622,29981],"class_list":["post-2627","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-personal","tag-amazon","tag-disciple","tag-engineer","tag-faith","tag-ford","tag-ford-books","tag-jews","tag-kiddush","tag-luke-ford","tag-nbsp","tag-new-books","tag-performance-anxiety","tag-personal-tutorials","tag-torah"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.10 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"I have severe kiddush performance anxiety syndrome. 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