{"id":1616,"date":"2007-12-02T14:03:53","date_gmt":"2007-12-02T20:51:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=1616"},"modified":"2007-12-04T19:29:58","modified_gmt":"2007-12-05T02:17:58","slug":"lone-gunman-envied-by-married-gunman","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=1616","title":{"rendered":"Lone Gunman Envied By Married Gunman"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonion.com\/content\/news\/lone_gunman_envied_by_married\">Report<\/a>:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>LOS ANGELES&mdash;If you ask Dale Henderson, a local assassin who celebrated his eighth wedding anniversary last month, lone gunman John Kingsley has no idea how good he has it.<\/p>\n<p>Able to stay out as late as he wants holding innocent civilians hostage, and free to make weekend murder plans without first getting permission from his wife, the 29-year-old bachelor is &quot;as lucky as they come.&quot;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><!--adsense--><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Report: LOS ANGELES&mdash;If you ask Dale Henderson, a local assassin who celebrated his eighth wedding anniversary last month, lone gunman John Kingsley has no idea how good he has it. Able to stay out as late as he wants holding &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/?p=1616\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[43],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1616","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-satire"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1616","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1616"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1616\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1616"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1616"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/lukeford.net\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1616"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}