My best self would spend zero time listening to pundits (I’ll exempt Steve Sailer, Christopher Caldwell, Peter Brimelow, Heather MacDonald, and occasionally Ann Coulter and Tucker Carlson). <\/p>\n
I think I just said that my best self would spend zero time listening to someone like me.<\/p>\n
If my commentary has a USP (unique selling proposition), it is my occasionally honest understanding of my own failures and how they help me better understand the world. For example, because I tend to be honest with myself and others (when appropriate and at times when it is inappropriate for me to be so raw), it is easy for me to tell when others are lying to me.<\/p>\n
I guess I listen to pundits because it is an easy way for me to figure out what I think by spotting nonsense in others.<\/p>\n
I am thrilled with this Trump administration but much of what he says and does makes no sense to me. Bullying Canada and Denmark seems stupid to me. Making Canada our 51st state does not make sense. Trump’s haphazard approach to tariffs does not make sense. <\/p>\n
When I look back on my life, I see how often I’ve failed to admit not knowing things. This hasn’t served me. Once my Geometry teacher (on my second attempt through the course in high school, both times I got a C grade) looked at my work and said, “You don’t understand what we’re doing, do you?” It was devastating because it was accurate.<\/p>\n
Perhaps the most regular feedback I’ve received over the course of my life has been, “What the f— is wrong with you?”<\/p>\n
When I pretend to understand things I don’t understand, I often get humiliated. On the other hand, when I’m in reality, I don’t get humiliated. I’ve learned from my regular helpings of humiliation to publicly admit that I don’t understand.<\/p>\n
I’d like to think that I’m doing the right thing by being publicly pro-Trump and publicly admitting that much of what he says and does make no sense and even seems dramatically counter-productive. <\/p>\n
I find it useful to look at my life as the product of my choices. I lack success in many things due to my unwillingness to do what it takes to be successful. For example, with my blogging and vlogging, I have nearly zero interest in what my potential audience wants. <\/p>\n
The most fateful decision I ever made was staying on the vegetarian diet my parents gave me. From age 14 on, people urged me to try meat. I dismissed them without giving their arguments any consideration. I was wrong. As a result, my life was crippled by fatigue and brain fog. <\/p>\n
My life has improved over the past decade by reducing the strength of my idea deflection shield. <\/p>\n
Sometimes I blog or vlog to fill a hole in my soul, or to distract from humiliation, or because I want to show off my verbal dexterity or because I want to amuse myself. I might be served by asking — how’s this going to help anyone?<\/p>\n
If I can share a rare truth, that’s a service. <\/p>\n
I find it tiring to make decisions, so I try to live as much of my life as possible by protocols. A couple of weeks ago, I stopped giving myself a choice about using my CPAP, and instead I automatically leave it on all night. For years I’ve hated my CPAP, recently I’ve come to accept it and then to embrace it. As a result, I’ve had the best sleep in my memory over the past two weeks.<\/p>\n
Whenever I hear people talk about needing to use more willpower, I know I’m hearing BS. We all have limited reserves of will power and conscious self-control.<\/p>\n