So there’s this woman whose dad is a rabbi. When she’s on her own, guys flock to her and flirt with her and hug her, but when her dad comes around, they’re suddenly very proper and then they bugger off. It reminds me that we all have a force field. When this rabbi comes around, people are suddenly very respectful. When I come around, people tell dirty jokes and ask how to get into certain industries.
I remember when I became Editor of my high school newspaper in 1983, and it bothered me when my friend Barry on the staff would rough house with me in the newspaper room. I wanted to be treated with more respect.
* You learn more when you regard people’s behavior as rational, purposeful and filled with meaning rather than dismissing them as ignorant and inept. People are usually doing the best they can. They’ve learned from reward and punishment over a lifetime. So if they’re acting strangely in your view, try to understand what they get out of it. Why am I so weird on FB and on my blogs and videos? Because I never learned to attach normally. This is my clumsy way of attaching to others.
* Washington DC – unless you have to be there for work, why would anyone live there? All the charm of a northern city with all the efficiency of a southern city. A sage asks me: David Stockman has a new book out. Is it good for the Jews? Also, is this article in the Washington Post, in which certain invidious comparison are made between Jew-run GW University and Jesuit-run Georgetown U (with far far fewer Jewish students than GW), good for the Jews? GW seems like a university for rich (largely New York) Jews who couldn’t make into the Ivy Leagues and for rich foreigners.
* Alexander Technique, Orthodox Judaism, working out, study etc can be such overwhelmingly hard work that you’re tempted to despair, but if you just show up to your lesson or to work or to the gym, and even if you just go through the motions, you’ll almost always get closer to where you want to go.
* My teacher keeps pushing me: Who are you talking to in your play? Who are you trying to connect to? Do you want to shock them? Push them away? I keep saying, I’m talking to my friend Joey Kurtzman.
* It’s easy to go your whole life in Orthodox Judaism and have no connection to God.
* What do high-achieving women get out of dating me? They get to shore up their self-esteem by dating the Great Underachiever. They can always look at my life and feel better about themselves. They can feel emotionally safe by having contempt for me.
* My daily mantra: I want to write what I want to write and I don’t care about the consequences.
* The goal for the second half of my life — change the trajectory from social disconnection to connection.
* Having someone cheat on you is like mourning a death. Who you saw yourselves as a couple is dead. (In Treatment)
* I get in trouble everywhere I go for saying hostile things. Whenever I can speak freely, I get in digs at others. It’s the socially acceptable expression of my eroticized rage.
* There’s almost nothing you can’t get away with so long as you talk like a gentleman.
* You learn more when you regard people’s behavior as rational, purposeful and filled with meaning rather than dismissing them as ignorant and inept. People are usually doing the best they can. They’ve learned from reward and punishment over a lifetime. So if they’re acting strangely in your view, try to understand what they get out of it. Why am I so weird on FB? Because I never learned to attach normally. This is my clumsy way of attaching to others.
* Does anyone else get depressed about the lack of change in the rest of your life from years of studying Alexander Technique? I have little body pain anymore. Everything I do easier. I’m less reactive. I’m more open. But that’s about it. I’m glad I studied the Technique and I feel privileged to teach it but if you have personality disorders etc, Alexander Technique ain’t gonna shift them much.
