I’m Live On My Cam! Shining My Light To The Nations From The Intersection Of Judaism & Sexual Sin (Pico/Robertson)!

Live chat, video! Click here to chat live with myself, Rodger Jacobs, Governor Spritzer et al!

ChutzLaHood:  good…..thanks.
ChutzLaHood:  What kind of engineering will you employ to make social change?
YourMoralLeader:  eugenics
ChutzLaHood:  So then the focus is on good genes?
ChutzLaHood:  Or more aptly put in LA, good jeans…………
ChutzLaHood:  Which would make Briteny Spears a good canidate?……..
YourMoralLeader:  i’m doing a lot of research
mrsspitzer:  where is that no account husband of mine…with you?
ChutzLaHood:  I wonder which latino politician will come under her gaze……
mrsspitzer:  did you wrap telefin yet…I’d like to wrap telefin around my husband’s neck
guest1:  haha
guest1:  that’s not a kosher use of tefillin
ChutzLaHood:  At least, Villaraigosa return descency to infidelity. We suffered a great loss under Clinton’s classless acts of infidelity.
YourMoralLeader:  yeah, i just got back from shul, tefillin, and a torah class
mrsspitzer:  I knew he was up to no good when I caught him reading Luke Ford archives from 2001
YourMoralLeader:  oy ve
mrsspitzer:  you’re all set spiritually for the day
mrsspitzer:  even the cough sounds better
mrsspitzer:  eating oats again?
YourMoralLeader:  yes, thanks, saw it weeks ago
YourMoralLeader:  cottage cheese
YourMoralLeader:  I’m feeling good, I’m getting a lot of love
YourMoralLeader:  my lips are sealed
mrsspitzer:  no kiss and tell equals no fun
ChutzLaHood:  As the Pope keeps his women a secret so does our moral leader.
mrsspitzer:  mrs spitzer will be available soon with a hefty cash settlement
ChutzLaHood:  Mrsspitzer, that questions falls outside of the realm of topic one may engage your Moral leader on.
mrsspitzer:  oh! OK so solly
ChutzLaHood:  Would you ask the Pope who his wife is? who his favorite concubine is?
guest1:  who wants to know who the pope is with?  Not a pretty picture, no matter who it is.
YourMoralLeader:  why do women find me so irresistible? my money, hovel?
mrsspitzer:  check this from the Washington Post
ChutzLaHood:  YML was schooled in the same hallowed institutions of religious leadership in Torrance……as the Pope. In a course entitled "What One May Speak of With Moral Seekers," the first rule is not to mention one conquests.
mrsspitzer:   New York governor had been known to "ask you to do things that, like, you might not think were safe."
guest1:  it’s the orange slice in your mouth
mrsspitzer:  Looks like the Gov was a Read Admiral
mrsspitzer:  Rear
ChutzLaHood:  At least, he had an interesting angle on infidelity.
mrsspitzer:  irresiatible…we ain’t going for that unless you shtup with the Hovel Cam on
ChutzLaHood:  He well compensated his lady friends; he helped them with their daily expenses and thus brought relief and solace to women who may never have experienced these things.
mrsspitzer:  OK not "on the job" but I’d like to meet the lady (lady’s) in question then turn the Hovel Cam off
ChutzLaHood:  Luke, have you ever realized that your Hovel may be more alluring the the Playboy mansion?
YourMoralLeader: 
YourMoralLeader:  no
mrsspitzer:  It’s easier to walk around
mrsspitzer:  you can never get lost in The Hovel
ChutzLaHood:  Evern considered changing your name to Luke Heffner?
ChutzLaHood:  For many a blond, the hovel is much more accessible.
ChutzLaHood:  Do you give weekly tours of the hovel?
YourMoralLeader:  only for special ladies

ChutzLaHood:  Does your Hovel also have a reverible aspect to it? If you turn it inside out, does it become a pizzaria?
YourMoralLeader:  it’s blowing up
ChutzLaHood:  How does one describes one’s long term presence in a hovel? Live? Reside? Dwell?
YourMoralLeader:  dwell
ChutzLaHood:  Is the Gematria for hovel and the beis hamikdash the same?
ChutzLaHood:  Will the Moshiach opt out of the Beis Hamikdash and dwell in a hovel?
YourMoralLeader:  or he may already be living there, chutz
ChutzLaHood:  Which Latino politician is next on the list for Salinas?
ChutzLaHood:  I think I may convert to Latino and take office just so I can enjoy the same ride the mayor had.
nicolletista:  luke they are flocking to you as to the baal shem tov for guidance on sptizer
nicolletista:  guidance that only you and your rabbinaical council can give
nicolletista:  they want responsa
nicolletista:  or at least jokes
nicolletista:  you are at the intersection of judaism and sexual sin
nicolletista:  that is, pico and robertson
nicolletista:  it’s nice that eliot spitzer neatly encapsulates your work of the past 15 years
nicolletista:  this lays the groundwork for the public television special celebrating your life

nicolletista:  of course it’s "dwell"
nicolletista:  like the shekinah
YourMoralLeader:  the presence
nicolletista:  well it certainly isn’t dwell magazine
nicolletista:  maybe they could do a special issue on hovels
nicolletista:  modern hovels
YourMoralLeader:  spitzer came up in shul this morning but the rabbi hushed it
ChutzLaHood:  Maybe, you could write a book on interior design of hovels……………???
nicolletista:  well that’s a load of crap
ChutzLaHood:  What is the latest fads in decorating hovels?
nicolletista:  hey man, i’m not buttchering on my porch, so i don’t care if some roabbi counts a patio as a utensil
nicolletista:  i want the straight dope on spitzer
YourMoralLeader:  An interior designer girl asked to come look at my hovel to make suggestions but she was so horrified by it she fled quickly
nicolletista:  i want lashon hara and don’t see why gentiles should have all the fun
YourMoralLeader:  I shouldn’t have pulled out my gun
YourMoralLeader:  some chix like that though
ChutzLaHood:  hovel 1358, "roofed passage, vent for smoke," later "shed for animals" (1435), of unknown origin. Meaning "shed for human habitation; rude or miserable cabin" is from 1625. It also sometimes meant "canopied niche for a statue or image" (1463).
ChutzLaHood:  –noun1.    a small, very humble dwelling house; a wretched hut.2.    any dirty, disorganized dwelling.3.    an open shed, as for sheltering cattle or tools.–verb (used with object)4.    to shelter or lodge as in a hovel.[Origin: 1375–1425; late ME hovell, of uncert.
nicolletista:  oh man luke, turns out living in your hovel is idolatrous
ChutzLaHood:  4.    to shelter or lodge as in a hovel.
User mrsspitzer changed their name to GovSpritzel.
GovSpritzel:  what up?
GovSpritzel:  I thought i was the only one who wasted the day away…
ChutzLaHood:  Luke, you could hovel some lonely, distraught woman and perform a miztvah!
nicolletista:  did it make you feel better yesterday on mad money when cramer said that he’d always be your friend?
YourMoralLeader:  yes!
ChutzLaHood:  Luke, have you ever hovelled before?
GovSpritzel:  That guy is right 50% of the time..I could do better
YourMoralLeader:  yep
ChutzLaHood:  It’s a verb and a noun.
ChutzLaHood:  hovelnounsmall crude shelter used as a dwelling
GovSpritzel:  Cash is NOT trash..remember that
ChutzLaHood:  hovel: noun-small crude shelter used as a dwelling
nicolletista:  thanks eliot
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GovSpritzel:  why am I doing this and NOT my taxes???
ChutzLaHood:  German:     der Schuppen
GovSpritzel:  nicol  how ya..have to met Luke in person yet?
YourMoralLeader:  I got a $347 refund!
GovSpritzel:  Nicol are you really a chick or Charles Manson typing in his cell?
nicolletista:  neither
GovSpritzel:  I’d take 374
YourMoralLeader:  I can tell nicole is allw oman
GovSpritzel:  Nicole is HUH?
GovSpritzel:  what kind of Oman?
nicolletista:  yes luke, it’s that kind of intuition that has provided you with a mansion and a long-term relationship
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ChutzLaHood:  Luke, how is your hovel-based blogging coming? It is making more money?
GovSpritzel:  Luke do you still keep in touch with yor former "long term relationship"? You know who?
YourMoralLeader:  errrrrr
GovSpritzel:  Ms. ———
ChutzLaHood:  I was thinking of some adjectives you could use: hovel-specific, hovel-based, hovel-centric……………
YourMoralLeader:  Chutz, I believe with perfect faith that a livable wage will come.
YourMoralLeader:  which one?
YourMoralLeader:  Gov
GovSpritzel:  you gotta have faith
ChutzLaHood:  I added as the 14th article of faith………….
ChutzLaHood:  Along with perfect faith that the Moshiach will come, I also have perfect faith that you’ll make money.
ChutzLaHood:  We should all add this to our recitation of Rambam’s 13 articles of faith.
YourMoralLeader:  Yes, I do
YourMoralLeader:  stay in touch
ChutzLaHood:  Maybe the collective petition will affect things on high so that down here the blessings will flow……….
GovSpritzel:  Nicol…tell us some juicy dirt on Luke
nicolletista:  The man is an open book
nicolletista:  no dirt necessary
GovSpritzel:  does he spend his Tax refund on Hookers…?
ChutzLaHood:  That is not in the spirit of us hovel-gazer’s belief system.
nicolletista:  i say that he does not
GovSpritzel:  not HookerS..no enough money..maybe ONE HOOKER
ChutzLaHood:  We need a new verb to describe what we are doing………..
ChutzLaHood:  how about hovel-gazing?
GovSpritzel:  One Hooker who needs to make rent
ChutzLaHood:  Hovel-viewing?
YourMoralLeader:  I will never buy a hooker, never have
ChutzLaHood:  Why buy when you can get them free?
nicolletista:  amalek does not agree however
GovSpritzel:  I’ve been to the Hovel..what you see now is exactly what it is..it’s not Gov Spritzel’s mansion
ChutzLaHood:  Or for at least a cup of coffee at a local star buck.
ChutzLaHood:  Hovel Gazers of LA…………..
ChutzLaHood:  Nicoletista, you can be our lady president……..so that we can be in the spirit of the times……..?
YourMoralLeader:  Do you want a different angle for the cam?
ChutzLaHood:  Our own version of the zeit gheist………….
GovSpritzel:  Burt I predict someday in the future tour busses will pass The Hovel like they do Clark Gables’ old house. It will be a landmark
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nicolletista:  Luke how long have you lived in the hovel anyway?
YourMoralLeader:  11 years
ChutzLaHood:  Maybe, we could put on Maps to stars’ homes?
ChutzLaHood:  Luke, you’re the only actor to have ever dwelt in that hovel?
YourMoralLeader:  dunno
YourMoralLeader:  Upon you guys, I will build my virtual shul
ChutzLaHood:  It isn’t the hovel that Robert Redford dwelled in?
YourMoralLeader:  Amalek, you are my rock
GovSpritzel:  I just heard on CNN that I’ll be resigning soon…all because my wife didn’t like sex in the back door…
YourMoralLeader:  I will make you fishers of men
ChutzLaHood:  Can I be the fondation stone?
YourMoralLeader:  Sure
GovSpritzel:  Amalek..time for you to run for Governor
nicolletista:  why don’t you call him peter, luke?
ChutzLaHood:  I have had bong-hits this morning…………
nicolletista:  i mean as long as you’re going xian on us
ChutzLaHood:  So, I really feel stoned enough to be a foundation stone.
GovSpritzel:  the New Governor is a Blind Black Guy…i think you can beat him
GovSpritzel:  just think of all those $5,000 hookers before you get busted.
ChutzLaHood:  Is there some kedushah in gum chewing?
YourMoralLeader:  Do you guys like the jaunty way I chew gum or is it unbecoming a moral leader?
GovSpritzel:  I have the sound down
GovSpritzel:  because it doesn’t work anyway
ChutzLaHood:  I think Moral Leader would be chewing on Tabacco.
ChutzLaHood:  Or on chinese herbs!
GovSpritzel:  Luke have you ever considered aking Amalek to move in with you?
GovSpritzel:  Two Jews in search of a future
ChutzLaHood:  Ok……have a good day………I have to go………and commit a horrible sin: an offline life……
GovSpritzel:  offline life? what’s that?
YourMoralLeader:  I bless you
ChutzLaHood:  Actually…….

GovSpritzel:  How about Nek Fred, Amalek and Luke all living in the Hovel on bunk beds..cheap rent for sure
ChutzLaHood:  Life has three divisions: on-hovel time, off-hovel time and hammer time.
nicolletista:  amalek weighs 350…no top bunk for him
User ChutzLaHood left the room.
GovSpritzel:  Mississippi…voting today..all those Inbreds goingto the pole
GovSpritzel:  Amalek sleeps on the bottem then
GovSpritzel:  what are you drinking Urine Analysis?
nicolletista:  luke, if you drinkn from bottles on webcam, no woman will ever like you
GovSpritzel:  Oy vey
nicolletista:  this is friendly advice
nicolletista:  seriously
GovSpritzel:  Luke, put that concoction in a Crystal Champaign bottle..that’ll get the chicks running over for a swig
nicolletista:  please….anything…but not that
GovSpritzel:  Luke burps, picks his nose and eats oats from the box too. no ediquette
GovSpritzel:  WOW market up 200 today..probably cuz i’m resigning soon.
GovSpritzel:  how’s the weather where you are today Luke?
GovSpritzel:  cloudy?
GovSpritzel:  sunny?
nicolletista:  ok luke, maybe i;’ll see you later
nicolletista:  good luck governor, probably the last time anyone will ever call you that
User nicolletista left the room.
GovSpritzel:  OK I’m outta here…gonna try and do something constructive….of course i won’t but…bye everyone
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MadCow:  omg not on the phone again lol
MadCow:  dunno y this guy streams cus he never bothers to talk to us, he just sits there admiring himself
ChutzLaHood:  Enhovelled……..Hovel cam……….
ChutzLaHood:  We have to have a language that reflects this experience.
ChutzLaHood:  Hovel sighting…………
ChutzLaHood: REM Losing my Religion
YourMoralLeader:  i love that song!
ChutzLaHood:  How about using that as the theme song for the hovel experience?
ChutzLaHood:  We must adorn the hovel with terminology, music themes, etc…………..
YourMoralLeader:  yes
YourMoralLeader:  I must make a music video
ChutzLaHood:  Does your blogging reflect your commonwealth experiences in any way?