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The Big Wait

Luke replies: I've been going to prayer meetings on Israel's behalf. Aside from that, I think...throw non-Jews out of Israel and tear down their churches and mosques so we can build the Third Temple and sacrifice to God again like the days of old.

Khunrum writes: Hey Luke... I am waiting for the Head Jew, Jesus Christ to come back and raise the dead, turn the Gatorade into wine, heal the sick, feed the poor, ride a donkey, walk on water, make some kitchen cabinets, get swallowed by a whale and coughed up (or was that someone else?), get killed, come back and say a bunch of profound stuff......hey, how much longer you figure we have to wait?

How Hollywood Sees Itself

From the Weekly Standard, Johnathan Last writes: Consider the case of the 74th Annual Academy Awards show a couple weeks ago. You remember it. The show opened with Tom Cruise, smirking and smiling as he walked across the stage and telling us how, in the wake of September 11, he had called all of his "actor friends" to ask if what they did with their lives was really important. "Should we celebrate the magic the movies bring? Now?" Tom wondered aloud. He paused, steeled his gaze, and thundered, "Dare I say it? More than ever!"

The show went downhill from there. Whoopi Goldberg made bad jokes and the producers ran a series of movie testimonials from luminaries such as Lani Guinier. Sidney Poitier was given a lifetime achievement award, and got his very own testimonial video, which, oddly, featured only black actors. And then there was Halle Berry. After winning Best Actress for her role in "Monster's Ball," Berry went on a long, hysterical, unhinged rant about the barriers she was breaking down for her race, the footsteps she was following in, and the discrimination that she encounters as a serious actress of color. Halle Berry, whose mother is white, was the Miss USA runner up in 1986 and a successful model before she turned to acting. She gets $2.5 million per picture and reportedly received a $500,000 bonus for taking her shirt off in last year's John Travolta disaster, "Swordfish."

The morning after the Oscars, newspapers across America were, appropriately, filled with derision. But not Variety.

Where everyone else in America sees ostentatious excess and self-aggrandizement, Hollywood sees restraint. There's a war going on and instead of paying tribute to the people who are doing important jobs, Hollywood gave us what Cintra Wilson rightly called "The We're Justifying Our Existence Oscars."

Scariest Time For Jews Since Holocaust

Dennis Prager writes on WorldNetDaily.com: This is the scariest time for Jews since the Holocaust.

The Jews are being abandoned. Again.

From the Jews' perspective, the world can be divided into three groups – those that hate the Jews and want them dead, those that ignore this hatred and aid the haters, and Americans.

Because Europe fears its immense Muslim population, because of its own anti-Semitism, because it is leftist, because it is dependent on Arab oil, and because America supports Israel, Europe is the primary support of those who wish another Jewish Holocaust. Europe, which has been a decaying civilization since the end of World War I, has reached a moral nadir – and once again at the Jews' expense.

So here we are, just one generation after nearly every Jew in Europe was murdered, and the remnant that remains in the New Jersey-sized Jewish state is threatened with extinction.

U.S. Holds Israel Back

From the Wall Street Journal: For over half a century, U.S. attempts to rein in Israel militarily have encouraged Arab aggression and contributed to a series of inconclusive wars, setting the stage for even bloodier clashes. By submitting to restrictions, Israel has compromised, not enhanced, its security.

The question of peace and war in the Middle East today hangs in the balance. Either President Bush can continue to bend to pressure and try to prevent Israel from defending itself, or he can allow Israel to finish rooting out the terrorist infrastructure in the territories. The first path, as history proves, leads only to escalating terror and larger-scale Israeli reactions, with a risk of regional war. Only by standing firm with Israel in its legitimate fight against terror can President Bush pave the way toward a viable cease-fire and renewed negotiations on ending the conflict. It is not too late--the pattern can still be broken.

Will Smith - Ethan Hawke Oscars Fist Fight

Ten minutes before the Best Actor Oscar, actor Ethan Hawke is in the bathroom with actor Denzel Washington, the eventual winner of the Best Actor Oscar. They're talking. Actor Will Smith walks in. Ethan Hawke turns to leave. He says, "I will see you, boys. By the way, one of you nigger motherfuckers is going to win the award tonight."

Will Smith turned around and hit him. Ethan Hawke got a black eye. You will notice on tape of the night that Hawke has a black eye. There was blood all over the place from Ethan Hawke's lip. Will Smith claimed he went home to look after his baby.

According to US Weekly: "9:45 P.M. Out of the blue, Ethan Hawke appears to have a black eye. Rumors fly that he got in a scuffle with Will Smith. Actually, it's just a lipstick smudge from Denzel Washington's wife, Pauletta."

Another source: "The first message, said Ethan supposedly dissed Will's performance as "Ali" to someone, and it got passed through a couple of people to Will. This person understood there was an altercation over it. To which someone replied... and said they had heard the same thing through their friend. This person elaborated, and said Will confronted Ethan about what he said, they had some words... and IF I remember it correctly... Will threw the first punch... but according to this writer, got more than he bargained for."

Another source: My stepbrother was gaffing for the event and told me....."Will Smith was in a very bad mood and basically started with Hawke...who didn't do anything for a moment but giggled...then Smith punched him in the face and stopped to make some "ghetto" comment to Hawke (want some of this bitch or something of that nature)but didn't even finish his sentence before Hawke smacked him 10-12 times HARD!!!! He said Smith was humiliated because he didn't do anything but flinch while getting lumped up."

Penthouse is Dying and yet I remain Silent?

Why, oh why, did I not nominate myself for a Pulitzer? Why am I watching transvestite movies like All About My Mother by Pedro Almodavar? Why am I recycling so much material on this website? Isn't there enough in Torah for me to talk about?

Has Luke Emailed The White House On Israel?

Fred writes: Have you been sending e-mails/faxes to the White House (president@whitehouse.gov) regarding the hypocritical demand of an Israeli pullback? Bush's comments are outrageous. When America gets whacked by terrorists, they come out with guns blazing. When Israel does it, they get criticized. What pure hypocrisy.

Luke replies: I've been going to prayer meetings on Israel's behalf. Aside from that, I think it is enough to stay quiet and humble, and meticulously observe God's commandments, and wait for God to send the Messiah to settle all this, and then kick all non-Jews out of Israel and tear down their churches and mosques so we can build the Third Temple and sacrifice to God again like the days of old.

The Hormonal Perils Of Hiring Female Journalists

I've long warned about the dangers of allowing women into the hallowed profession of journalism. The story about Sue Schmidt dealing with her critics by writing to their bosses reinforces my lifelong belief that many women are hormonally not suited for public positions such as journalist. Could you imagine a man pulling that? No way.

Women tend to be more sensitive than men, and many are not able to hack it in the working world without reducing standards and requiring their co-workers to undergo sensitivity training to accommodate the hormonal tides of the new female hires. Women were designed by God or nature to stay home and look after their children. As Martin Luther said, women were made with big hips so they could stay at home and sit on them. If women desire to affect society, they should exercise their influence in the bedroom and the kitchen, and not the newsroom.

See Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez.

Calmglass writes on alt.gossip.celebrities: lol oh gotta love these inbred, cow fucking, donkey/horse/redneck threesome-having, bed sheet wearing, bonfire burning, good for nothing trolls

Liz writes: Well, apparently Luke Ford and Martin Luther never read Proverbs 31. That woman was definitely a working woman, not one to sit on her "big hips" all day. God said her price was far above rubies. Let Luke Ford argue with Him.

Martin Brimmer writes on LF.com: Over at his new homestead at lukeford.net, the former occupant of this site - a self-described journalist with the cranial capacity of a cantaloupe and the all the ability to reason of an inbred orangutang - issued a harangue against female journalists titled "The Hormonal Perils of Hiring Female Journalists" wherein he reflected on his "lifelong belief that many women are hormonally not suited for public positions such as journalist."

Andrea Thompson

Andrea Thompson resigned from CNN a couple of weeks ago. From my archives:

4/29/01

I returned home from my Friday morning prayers and surfed over to MediaNews.com to get the latest. And the site referred me to this article on the humiliation of CNN reporter and actress Andrea Thompson:

After nude pictures emerge on the Net, the Cable News Network may be backpedaling on the controversial hire of Andrea Thompson.

CNN had every expectation that Andrea Thompson, the cable network's new national correspondent, would be hot ratings material. After all, Thompson was hot stuff in her four years on ABC's cop drama NYPD Blue as the tough-talking Detective Jill Kirkendall. But thanks to some revelatory images on the Internet, it now it appears that she might be too hot for CNN to handle.

The decision to hire Thompson, a high-school dropout with less than a year of experience in the news business, was already controversial and quickly drew fire from within CNN and the broader journalism community. Her appointment to a prized position – one that many CNN correspondents spend years and decades striving for – angered many of Thompson's soon-to-be colleagues. Media critics decried what they saw as a naked attempt to boost ratings at the expense of CNN's vaunted journalistic reputation.

Now, The Industry Standard has learned that CNN might be backing away from its controversial decision to hire Thompson. On Wednesday, CNN executives learned of topless pictures of Thompson circulating on the Internet, pictures culled from her 15-year Hollywood career as an actress and model, and a career dominated by bit roles in Baywatch, JAG, Silk Stalkings and Arli$$. Most damning to CNN, it seems, were her nude scenes in a 1986 Italian erotic film called Manhattan Gigolo.

Andrea Thompson played the hooker in the movie Wall Street. She stops by the room of Charlie Sheen, takes him into a limousine and give him cocaine and a blowjob.

Thompson issued a statement saying she ''did pose for Black And White magazine, a prestigious artistic publication, several years ago. I did this as a piece of art and make no apologies for the decision I've made as an artist in my 20-year career.''

Chris Berg, who heads the news department at KOB-TV, suggested that Thompson, who has worked at rival KRQE since leaving Blue, posed no competition. "I think working in Albuquerque is out of her league, " he told the Albuquerque Journal. "Yes, I think she has improved as a news reporter, but she's still not good enough to work at our station."

Fred writes Luke: Sir: I sympathize with your standing up for journalistic integrity. If a bedrock, no a Rock of Gibralter of journalistic integrity like lukeford.com does not stand up for the integrity of journalism, who will? Surely, we cannot expect the weaker sisters of journalism, like the N.Y. Times, or the Times of London to carry the banner of integrity if lukeford.com fails in this important task.

Frankly, a great deal of "casting" for TV news is based on physical attractiveness, poise, and other things that in general have nothing to do with journalism. I have a vague recollection of seeing a documentary a few years back on a television journalism program at either Brigham Young or University of Utah, where they took time to teach students about how to look good on camera, i.e. issues regarding wardrobe, makeup, etc. I thought that was tacky as hell. But if you're going to go that far, why the hell not just hire actors as TV reporters. After all, an actor should know how to act authoritative, and exude that "I'm smart, serious and telling you the truth" attitude. What the hell difference does it make if the actor is just reading a script, and has no fucking clue who the president is, where the Colombian drug lords are from (some college in N.Y., I think), or who's buried in Grant's tomb?

It's like division of labor. If you're going to make a movie, you have some guys who are really good at carpentry to build the sets, other guys who are really good writers to write the script, and other guys who look good and can remember their lines to act.

Look, do you think Tom Cruise could build a competent set, or write a competent screen play? Probably not, and it doesn't matter. That's not why he gets hired.

When you saw the movie Patton, did you really think that George C. Scott had the slightest clue as to how to command an army? Probably not.

So why should we demand that the guys who read our news be able to do anything else? Does it make the news any more believable or accurate? I don't think so.

WARREN BERGER writes Jim Romenesko at MediaNews.com: I'm a huge fan of your site and think you're doing a fantastic job. But I have to question why, on the story about Andrea Thompson, you had a link taking the reader to a topless picture of her. To run a story about the pictures is fine, because it is news. But should your site be, in effect, passing around dirty pics of a fellow journalist? Whatever people may think of Ms. Thompson's credentials, she is one of us now, and she deserves better than this.

From BRUCE BARTLETT, Syndicated columnnist, Creators Syndicate: I am very amused by all the criticism that former actress Andrea Thompson is getting for her foray into journalism. I think the reason why so many television news people are reacting so negatively to her is because the line between what they do and what she did on shows like NYPD Blue is so thin. Most television "journalists" in my opinion are nothing but actors to begin with. Both essentially do the same thing: read lines written for them by someone else and try to look good and appear believable while doing so. All the heavy lifting in television news is done by producers, whom one never sees on camera. They deserve to be called journalists. But most of the people we see on the screen are just pretty faces. That being the case, I for one would much rather see Andrea Thompson when I turn on CNN than any of the other news readers it employs.

Amber@EroticVideos.com phoned Luke Friday morning.

Amber: "I've never been so upset. You generally don't approve of women being reporters? Because we're supposed to be porn stars, strippers or mothers?"

Luke: "I'm writing out more of a primal feeling than something thought out. When women go into professions, those professions lose their glamor to men."

Amber: "Luke, I've always defended you when people talked shit. Because I have respect for you and what you're trying to do. You're trying to say that there's more to this industry than... And I've always stood by you even when I disagreed with you. Because I've always believed that you were trying to make a difference. I can not believe that you would say something like that. That hurts my feelings really bad. I take that personally.

"I struggle every day, as does every girl that works in this office, because we are some of the only genuine females in this business that don't get naked. And we have to put up with this shit. You can't imagine what we have to go through.

"I am in shock that you would put something like that on your site. That hurts my feelings so bad that you should say something like that. That means that all our conversations are just bullshit and I am nothing more than a stupid woman to you. And that totally and completely breaks my heart."

Luke: "Don't you ever have feelings or thoughts that embarrass you because they go completely against your values or you find yourself looking down on people and things that you wished you didn't? But if you were honest, you'd have to admit that's what you're feeling?"

Amber: "I can't say that I'd recall one. Again, we're all from the South. I was raised that if you were honest about your feelings..."

Luke: "Let's say you're driving. And someone cuts you off. And you see that they are a minority. Don't you ever think, 'Oh, what a stupid Jew/black/latino/nun/old lady etc?"

Amber: "Honestly, I would say, 'Fucking dumbass.' I don't think that way. People are different but I would never give that as an excuse, to say that you're from California or New York, for saying that women aren't worthy of doing a fucking job."

Luke: "You can't take my site at face value."

Amber: "Not your site, something you said..."

Luke: "You can't take everything I say at face value."

Amber: "But I do. I had a lot of respect for you. I really really valued what you did. I really go to bat for you. When your name comes up, I'm first one to speak up for you. I really believe that you can be a good force for our industry. But what you just did here, you could never go to bat genuinely for any of the girls. Because you would be such a hypocrite. You don't care about them. They're just fucking whores to you. And that's what you said without saying it. That every woman has her place and that place is to be barefoot, pregnant and knocked up in the home.

"I worked my ass for this industry. When that stuff happened to Devon, we all went to bat for her. Not because we thought she was right or wrong but because she's a girl, maybe the guys at Vivid didn't understand her. That's what we do because we're girls. And that you would say that, and degrade us, and say that we're not worthy, shame on you. Shame on you. I thought you were so much better than every sleazeball in this business. But I stand corrected because you're not. You're just down there with them.

"The next time something bad happens, and I'd say, 'He's better than them,' well, I will never say that again. Because you are just like them. You are like Mr Marcus, you are like Marc Wallice, you are like Bobby [Vitale]. You are like every one of them. You are a man. And I will never think anything different about you unless you post a retraction. Because I genuinely believed you were different. I thought you were better. I thought you had a genuine insight into what the girls, every day in this business, have to struggle with."

Luke: "I'm sure if there was a mind reading device, and someone put that to your brain, they would find that you, like anyone else, have a lot of opinions and views and neuroses, which, if taken in isolation, would look very bad. My site is freeflowing. And I will sometimes post feelings of mine that are completely inappropriate."

Amber: "They are inappropriate. You can not degrade women in that manner. That's what you have done. So you're not going to post a retraction. You're going to stand by the fact that it is ok to be a male chauvinist pig."

Luke: "I am going to stand by the fact that it is ok to express on occassion male chauvinist comments."

Amber: "That's where you're wrong. And that's one of the things that I always liked about you. You always backed off from the racist comments. When that Mr Marcus thing hit, I was really impressed by how you handled that. I got carbon copies some of that stuff that psycho freak Bryan would send you, and you never posted those. If you're going to back off on racism, why did you post that comment? Why encourage degrading women?

"And I am not saying that some of these women don't degrade themselves. Yes they do. But why can you not be above the crowd. You've been above it most of the time, aside from the fact that you're still posting pictures of 17 year old girls."

Luke: "I will on occassion post thoughts and feelings of mine that are not good. I was embarrassed on that whole [Andrea Thompson] story..."

Amber: "You are forcing my whole hand. As a female in this industry, I can not back off. I have to take you on publicly on this issue. You know I have to. I'm serious. I am so mad. I'm writing it out. I'm giving you one chance. By the time I get back tonight, if it's not down, I'm taking you on on this. With the utmost respect but I can't sit there and let you do that."

Luke: "You should."

Amber: "So you're really not pulling it?"

Luke: "No, but I won't take any personal offence. I made a disgusting chauvinist comment."

Amber: "I just thought you were better than that."

Luke: "The way I conduct myself with women in general is on a high plane."

Amber: "As long as we know our place?"

Luke: "Look. I met this woman at synagogue two weeks ago. And we've exchanged email. And last night, I repeated to her a question that I got from Chaim Amalek. Why does the company web site not feature a photo of her so we can judge her fundamental worth as a woman?"

Amber: "Excuse me? Based on her looks?"

Luke: "It's sarcastic."

Amber: "That's completely inappropriate."

Luke: "Well, I wanted to see how she'd react. You could say that's sadistic."

Amber: "It's being a man.

"I'm having April pull out my rollerdex at this time and I'm calling every single girl I have in this rollerdex and I am pulling out Kelly's rollerdex and I am calling every single girl in that rollerdex unless you retract."

Luke: "I'm not going to retract a stray comment just because it is offensive."

Amber: "Ok, the war is on. Let's see who has the bigger balls by the end of the week. A week from today. I'm betting you that by Friday, May 4th, you're posting a retraction. Fair?"

PornPro writes Luke: "For you - a purported "journalist" who couldn't get the facts to a story straight if your life depended on it; who regularly deals in unsubstantiated gossip and innuendo - to criticize Andrea Thompson for lacking "journalistic integrity" is the funniest thing I've heard all morning. Or the most hypocritical. Better stick to those non-factual topics, Luke, like all your silly, superstitious religious beliefs."

Redneckguy writes: Mr. Ford: Don't do it! Don't you do it! It don't matter what all them whores think, you be a man and stick to your guns. I can't believe that Amber woman is a Southern bred female. Her Daddy oughta be shot for allowing her head to get filled with such nonsense. Mr. Ford, you called it the way you saw it. And I swear on my NRA membership, and everything else that's sacred to all good Christians, that you called it right. If that other woman wants to be a good honest reporter like yourself, Mr. Ford, she shoulda thought twice before she took off her clothes in front of that camera and let everyone see her for the whore she is. You make a living reporting on these whores, and good gentlemen like yourself, and that Mr. Sturnam, and Mr. Craven, oughta be worshipped by these whores cause of all the special attention you lavish on them. It makes me plain angry. Every woman on this planet has a one basic choice to make at some time in her life: to be a whore or not to be one. And if they choose whorishness, well then, by God, they oughta just be happy with it and quit their snivellin. And if these other women who maybe aren't exactly whores want to step up and defend them, well then, they might as well get rid of their duds, step up in front of Mr. Craven's camera, and be whores too. It'd make life more simpler for them, and they'd have more time to think about more important stuff, like pleasin their man.

Fred writes Luke: I assume (with only about 70% certainty) that this was the result you were hoping to achieve by posting this editorial. My guess is that your readership will now go up. Plus, you will probably get about 5 or 10 angry e-mails that you can post on your site as "content". This is brilliant.

I say the odds are 2/3 that you apologize, or give some mealy-mouth explanation like "I did this to get a rise out of people." The odds are 1/3 that you stick to your guns.

BTW, what do you know about "Amber"? Is she good looking? What kind of woman becomes a reporter at "Erotic Videos"? See what you can dig up about her?

Actually, you should offer to meet her, try to schtuppe her, and then post a story on lukeford.com about the experience.

Also, what do you know about Amber's journalism? Has she written any articles? See if you can get some (on the pretext of seeing if she has what it takes, journalistically). Then you can post them, and provide some kind of outrageously unfair critique.

Rumdar writes Luke: Should it not go well for Andrea Thompson I believe there is an alternative gig waiting for her (tailor made as it were) at www.NakedNews.com

Lynne L-patin: It is absolutely irrelevant that professions hold "glamor" to men. The problem is that when women enter a profession, the wages drop.

Max writes Luke: The thing for me that makes your site interesting is the fact that you inject some intelectual thoughts along with some good journalism into your site. I do however, have one question... Do you think that once you run a story such as the Andrea the CNN gal, and discuss the moral and ethical ramifications as it relates to journalism, that most of your readers are lost or shall I say, not smart enough to understand? I am by no means demeaning some of your readers, but it would appear that many would rather read how this actress had this for dinner etc.

Rob writes: This whole story kills me. All the pornlets dream of going mainstream after being analed by Mr. Marcus and this broad who did a few soft-core tit shots is being branded with the scarlet letter. Pornlets wake up!

Memo To All Female Journalists - Make Babies And Shut Up

Chaim Amalek writes Luke: NO FREAKING WAY SHOULD YOU RETRACT YOUR STATEMENT. The stone cold truth is that women do not have the genetic capital necessary to be objective reporters. For a woman of child bearing years to be working is itself a declaration of war on nature. Besides, such a "war" would be about the best thing to happen to you professionally since you first got into this business. All the men who run the porn biz (and they are the only ones who count, when you get right down to it) will get a chuckle out of it and think "That Luke Ford - maybe he really DOES have some balls after all. I think I will give him a call." The women in the business who are not lesbians or feminists or Bush-hating, cat-owning, douche-defying liberals will begin to see you in a more manly light and want to ---- you, and this will rub off on all aspects of your personal life in no time. Even your CFS, BSE or whatever that is called will begin to subside.

Luke, you might even have the genesis of a new political movement here. I have the slogan you should use - Don't be stupid, be a smarty. Come and join Luke Ford's party.

Scott Lawrence writes: Luke, this broad can't work at CNN-she's not cross-eyed! Women should not be in the news biz. I mean, what with THE CURSE every month, it would severely limit their ability to handle breaking news (and other than Walter Cronkite nobody wants a bloated newscaster).

And stand your ground Luke! Don't retract. Like with Marc Wallice, you are right about this.

I find it amusing she defends that Black and White spread but declines to mention Midnight Gigolo. And for Amber (another angry stripper), don't worry about the high school dropout Andrea- I hear Robert Lombard needs a blond for the new Showtime series NUDES AT ELEVEN. Andrea will be pefect!

Damian writes: Why is there a question as to whether or not Andrea Thompson is qualified to read the news? Of course she is. She has no high school diploma and no journalism background (until her first job in TV news reporting recently), that's true. But what qualifications are needed? A pleasant appearance and the ability to read news off the teleprompter are about it. The other news readers have better qualifications? Really?

The real reason there is an uproar in the news industry over this is because it points out what little qualification one must have to do this job. Hell, it's not like they were doctors or something, they just read the news. Give me Andrea Thompson or Laurie Dhue any day of the week. Oh, and I hope Laurie doesn't have immense journalism credentials. It would ruin her image as my sex object.

Goddess writes: You can pick either a nude Dan Rather or a nude Andrea Thompson to read your news to you, Lukey baby. *NOW* which one would you rather have? A wrinkly old college diploma or hot ta-ta's...what's it gonna be?

Porn star Ruby writes: Luke, You absolutely have the right to make stupid, chauvinistic comments. I also have the right to say, women are more advanced than men in their thought patterns, men have more simplistic thought patterns, which makes them better at simple direct tasks. We could argue superiority all day but such arguments bore me. To really be honest, who wants to be a reporter, I'd rather own the whole friggin corporation!!! I could out intellectualize Chaim any day!!

Luke Marches For Israel

The terrible thing about being single is that everywhere you go, no matter how sacred an occasion, you find yourself using it to try to meet the opposite sex. So I marched by the federal building in Westwood today, joining about 1000 other Jews rallying for Israel.

I'm not a comfortable marcher or flag waver or placard carrier. Protesting does not come naturally to me. I am more of a disinterested observer type - a voyeur afraid of real emotional interaction.

Amalek18: Hey, be sure to see 60 Minutes tonight - best to watch it with a jewish woman of a certain age
Amalek18: the second segment, by Leslie Stahl, goes into the error women are making in estimating the effect of age on fertility
Amalek18: Lesle notes that her generation understood that at 35, it is "over " for a woman
Amalek18: But the young ones think they can defer it all until their fifties

Amalek18: The author you wrote of, Israel Shahak, has written a number of interesting books on jews
Amalek18: I have "Open Secrets: Israel's Nuclear and Foreign Policy Secrets"
Amalek18: Why be orthodox?
Luzdedos1: Because most of my friends are orthodox.
Amalek18: That is backwards
Luzdedos1: Because most of the people I most admire are orthodox. Because most of the people I most want to be close to are orthodox. Becuase it is the most morally effective system.
Amalek18: Well, could not the members of the National Alliance make exactly the same case for being members?
Amalek18: It seems that you have assumed a weirdly amoral stance in justifying your faith
Luzdedos1: Why? Friends are about the most important criterion for such matters.
Amalek18: Suppose you met some very nice people who happened to believe that Pierce is correct.
Amalek18: And many Klansmen likely were great friends to their pals
Amalek18: You are ignoring morality and ethics in your religious orientation. You concede that much of jewish orthodoxy is abhorent and hateful, yet you justify clinging to it because they are your "friends" - even though you have been expelled from orthodox shul after orthodox shul
Amalek18: I think maybe the rabbenim smell this opportunism within you, and that it is for that reason, more than any other , that they have chosen to regard you as a gentile
Amalek18: But AMALEK welcomes you just as you are.

Luzdedos1: I just talked to one of the first producers who looked me up on the internet.
Luzdedos1: He saw my picture and read excerpts from my book and he congratulated me on my first book.
Amalek18: who? gay?
Amalek18: gayjew?
Amalek18: what is his name?
Luzdedos1: XXX
Amalek18: fag
Amalek18: fag name.
Amalek18: jew name too
Amalek18: He should chance it before the arabs get to him

Amalek18: You make a strong argument NOT to be orthodox
Amalek18: Why are you? Is it just careerism?
Luzdedos1: Orthodoxy is where there is the strongest Jewish community. It is the most morally effective system. It brings one close to God.
Amalek18: But you just don't believe in it.
Amalek18: And they do not believe in YOU
Luzdedos1: It frequently is intellectually dishonest. It is frequently thought control, mind control, of the most primitive type...
Amalek18: So, either way, it is a sham all around. You are just pretending to be a believer, the rabbenim understand this, they reject you, and you pretend to wonder why
Amalek18: And what is your payoff? Living in a hovel.
Luzdedos1: I went to a rally for Israel today and saw many of my Orthodox Jewish "friends" but they really didn't want much to do with me.
Amalek18: Why should they want to have much to do with you when they and you know that it is all a sham with you?
Luzdedos1: I am more Orthoprax - orthodox in practice, while intellectually open minded
Amalek18: Remember, these jews are a high IQ race. You cannot fool them the way they are able to fool the goyim
Luzdedos1: No, I've found a shul that accepts me. And many in the community accept me too. And maybe I will become the Matt Drudge of Orthodox Judaism.
Amalek18: That won't be of any use to me
Luzdedos1: I will be the Martin Luther of Orthodox Judaism
Amalek18: When was the last time a jewess under 30 kissed you on the lips?
Luzdedos1: Sincerely, I believe in Orthodox Judaism far more than I believe in almost anything else, far more than in myself. Luzdedos1: As a morally educative tool
Amalek18: Well, we have exhausted this topic. I wish you well in your journey

Luzdedos1: sorry I am not more amusing.
Amalek18: you ought to write more about some of the morally questionable things you have found in core jewish writings Amalek18: We all need to learn more about these things if we are to move forward.
Luzdedos1: Orthodox Judaism reminds me of my daddy. Finding flaws in Orthodox Judaism is like hurting daddy.
Amalek18: That's nice.
Amalek18: You need to purge yourself of all those weirdo jewish thoughts
Luzdedos1: The Orthodox generally hold the key to the sacred texts, so I have to suck up to them so I can get inside the texts.
Amalek18: You still live in a garage
Amalek18: Why not work as a male temp?
Amalek18: You could be a secretary to a manlawyer

XXX writes: I've got a friend who wants to become an Orthodox Jew and I feel like rescuing him.

Luke replies: You gotta stand back and see if it works out for him. You should NEVER stand between someone doing more mitzvos... Never ever... If you're not up to full observance, don't detract from someone else's... Don't try to save him from orthodox judaism or try to talk him out of it... If it comes up, by all means share your frustrations with Orthodox Judaism.

The Luke Ford Of Television

From the New York Observer:

Not long ago, a rabbi’s son from New Jersey named David Rosenthal was one of the hottest writers in television. He made millions of dollars and played a key role in the success of sitcoms like Ellen and Spin City. He was young, funny and smart, and important people like Jeffrey Katzenberg loved his work. People wanted to be in the David Rosenthal business.

Today, some people think David Rosenthal is crazy. It has been nearly a year since Mr. Rosenthal, 33, left his marriage and abandoned Hollywood, leaving barely a trace. He estranged himself from close friends and colleagues, moved into posh hotels and gave away a million dollars to young women, some of whom he barely knew. He wrote an angry play called Love, which contains an extraordinary amount of cursing. Love also details Mr. Rosenthal’s feelings about faith, monogamy and his desire to have intercourse with the supermodel Heidi Klum. Mr. Rosenthal said that after he sent a copy of the play to his father, his father took him to a mental hospital, where Mr. Rosenthal was kept for 48 hours.

Mr. Rosenthal believes his story is relatively easy to explain.

"One day I was like, ‘Wait a minute!’" he said. It was late on the afternoon of Wednesday, Aug. 15, and Mr. Rosenthal was sitting in an easy chair in the lobby of the Four Seasons. "‘I don’t care about money. I don’t care about power. I don’t care about success. What do I care about?’ You know what I realized?

"I wanted to have sex with Heidi Klum," he said. "I was sitting there in my five-bedroom house, with my pool and my brand-new Porsche convertible in the driveway and my two-and-a-half-million-dollar-a-year job at Twentieth Century Fox studios, and I realized that I would rather be having sex with Heidi Klum. I would give all of this up right now to go have sex with Heidi Klum … and so I sat down and wrote this play."

Heidi Are You Listening to Me? Well I am the Only One Here...

Chaim Amalek writes: Not to be mean, but Luke never approached this guy in terms of success. (TV Jew was pulling in a double-comma income doing work that others admire - what did Luke ever do?) Now let's be honest here. If given the choice between doing whatever it is you are doing and having sex with blonde shiksa goddess Heidi Klum, woudn't you go for the sex? Sex is what life is all about - not davening, not becoming a better person, not even becoming rich. Just sex. Especially with genetically superior blonde aryan shiksa goddesses, the women we REALLY want to have our children. (By the way, I envy future generations of men, for the only females who will be born in the distant future are those who look like Heidi Klum. The rest will be aborted, or sent to third world lands.)

The prospect, no matter how unlikely, of sex with such beautiful women is what drives men to try to become rich. If there were no beautiful women in this country our whole economy would collapse. If Heidi Klum agrees to have sex with me I will do whatever she wants me to do. Heidi, are you listening?

100 Girls

JMT writes: Luke, never mind the middle east; continue interviewing shallow Hollywood hustlers. See this link. I just watched 100 Girls on cable when I should have been doing my taxes. It was actually pretty decent. You should try to talk to this guy Davis. If he's got enough time on his hands to submit a response to a review on Mr.Skin.com, he'll probably grant you an interview.

Snoopy writes on MrSkin.com: This is a pretty cute coming-of-age flick which has been languishing in distributor purgatory for two years, before going to video/DVD without a US theatrical release. An indy filmed in late 1999, it was hoped to be a summer youth comedy, ala American Pie, but it never managed to work out a US distribution deal, and it may still not have one. They are now talking on the official web site about releasing it in the summer of 2001 in the USA, even though it has already been playing for some months across the world. I hope they start to have better luck, and I don't know why they can't make a U.S. deal. They have some hot names in the cast: Jaime Pressly (the major babe of Poison Ivy 3), Marissa Ribisi (Grown Ups; she's Giovanni's twin sister), Katherine Heigl (Roswell), Emmanuelle Chriqui (Snow Day).

And I like the concept. Matt is a college freshman, a virgin, a bright and sensitive kid but basically a dweeb. Early in the year he is trapped in an elevator with a girl during a blackout, they have a heartfelt discussion... but he never sees her face. When he wakes up, she's gone without a trace. Ignoring the fact that she would have left a note if she wanted to see him again, Matt knows that he's found his true love, and will have to find her. All he knows is that she resides in a certain dorm with 100 residents, so he has to concoct a series of ploys in order to gain admittance to the building and the trust of the girls. One of the girls becomes his accomplice, and they come up with two different plans. Sometimes Matt is the uniformed maintenance man who will take care of the girls dorm. Sometimes he's in drag as a woman.

In the course of the semester, he really learns a lot about women while searching for his honey. He learns so much that after his speech to 100 open windows, begging his secret lover to reveal her identity, she does not, but all the other hetero girls claim they were the one! He can basically have any of them, and he's come to like many of them during the year, but he's a romantic and continues his search for his true love.

The girls are completely at ease when they are drunk and Matt is in drag, and they tell some hilarious stories to each other.

Believe it or not, it is an intelligent movie. Possibly too intelligent for this genre. In fact, the dialogue is certainly too intelligent for this or any other genre. The characters actually talk in written English rather than spoken English, the kind of poetic rhapsodies that nobody is capable of in real life, not JFK or Churchill or anybody else.

Matt's speech to the 100 open windows is the spiritual descendant of Kevin Costner's famous speech in Bull Durham, too articulate to really be off the cuff, and it has the same impact on all 100 girls that Costner's words had on Susan Sarandon.

Let's just say that the movie walks a fine line between literate and literary, and sometimes it may cross over the line a bit too far, but you'll allow it because it isn't boring and it produces the desired effect. Hope they get a US distributor, and I hope they can get an r-rating, because I think a lot of young people will like this funny and sincere film. I won't say it's a sure hit, but I think it deserves a chance to let the popular jury make that call. It has a strong pro-female stance in that it portrays women as the only real grown-ups in the world, and Matt's experience in drag really sensitizes him to how much crap women have to tolerate, so it could reach out to a female audience, assuming the rough talk is OK with them. Young guys should like it, and learn from it. Some of them will buy a ticket just to see Katherine Heigl playing foosball in her bra. And I predict they won't demand a refund.

Director Michael Davis writes: Lions Gate picked it up for distribution. I think it should be out on video in September, 2001. I also wrote and directed Eight Days A Week with Keri Russell. Here's the deal on indy film distribution. Indy distributors only pick up movies they can sell with print advertising because they can't afford expensive TV advertising. Distributors think youth comedies like mine can only reach their core audience through TV advertising, thus no indy distributors will pick the film up for a theatrical releases. Places like Lions Gate will pick it up for video and cable because it is a slam dunk to make money. Studios rarely pick up indy movies. They're like a couple who want to have a baby - they would rather make their own (even if it turns out defective) than adopt one that might be wonderful. That's why 100 Girls languished in distributor purgatory. I make indy films that should be studio films, not arty art house fare, thus the films end up in limbo. But, hey ... Eight Days a Week is finding an audience and the cable channels of the world are playing the crap out of it. Check out 8 Days A Week. The watermelon came before the pie. See the movie and you'll know what I mean.

Luke Ford on the Middle East

I am as riveted by what is happening in Israel as any identifying Jew. I haven't been writing about it because I have nothing to add that is more profound than the regular output of folks like Dennis Prager, George Will, and The New Republic, National Review and Weekly Standard magazines. I seriously considered making aliyah to Israel 18 months ago, but I've lacked the courage.

Luke Disappointed To Find Orthodox Judaism Not Entire Solution To All His Problems

As I made the Sabbath day holy Saturday afternoon by lying on my beach towel in the backyard, soaking up a few rays of sun, I reflected that Orthodox Judaism has, in addition to giving me many things, made numerous and onerous demands on my behavior and thought, and failed to entirely meet all my wants and needs.

Then I considered attending a special prayer service for Israel Saturday night. Perhaps the Jewish state was a mistake. Perhaps we Jews should just observe God's commandments and wait humbly and patiently for God to send the Messiah, throw all non-Jews out of the land of Israel, destroy all Churches, Mosques and other forms of idolatry out of the land of Israel, and establish the rule of God's law where all homosexuals could be put to death, as the Torah requires.

I then meditated on the superiority of God's chosen people. My guess is that about half of Israelis, including most of those on the right side of the political spectrum, believe that Jewish lives, blood and souls are more valuable than that of non-Jews. My guess is that 75% of Orthodox Jews think this way. By contrast, the teachers that I admire, such as Dennis Prager and Rabbi Joseph Telushkin, say that choseness means chosen for service, not for inherent superiority.

The more religious you get in Jewish life, the more likely you are to find belief in the inherent superiority of Jewish souls. When you get among the ultra-Orthodox, you frequently find views of non-Jews as worthless. I've been reading a frightening book about this, "Jewish Fundamentalism In Israel" by Israel Shahak and Norton Mezvinsky.

According to Menachem Friedman, a Modern Orthodox Jewish professor at Bar-Ilan University in Israel, Charedim [ultra-orthodox] believes that non-Jews want to kill and destroy the Jews, and the only differences betweeen Charedim is how Jews should react. Rabbi Shach, leader of Ashkenazi Jewry, counsels that Jews should keep quiet and refrain from provoking non-Jews by reminding them of our existence. Others, like the late Lubovitcher Rebbe, say Jews and Israel need to stand strong to defend ourselves against the non-Jews who always want to destroy us.

"The essence of Haredi thought is the notion of an abyss separating the Jews from the Gentiles." (Davar, 11/4/88)

I wonder how many Israelis and Orthodox Jews believe that it is in the DNA of Palestinians and Arabs to want to kill and destroy Jews? Likud politician Uzi Landau once said: "Syrian policies are fixed by a genetic code not subject to rapid changes." (Haaretz, 10/6/93)

I wonder what the results would be of a secret poll of yeshiva boys about whether one should break the Sabbath to save the life of a non-Jew? Numerous precedents in Jewish Law state that one should not break the Sabbath to save the life of a non-Jew, something I find impossible to swallow. Many of the decisions in favor of breaking the Sabbath to save the life of a non-Jew state the principle reason for doing this is so that non-Jews won't hate Jews.

Here's a major difference between the low views many Jews have of Gentiles and the low views many Gentiles have of Jews. Jews negative views of Gentiles don't lead Jews to physically attack or persecute Gentiles. We're a peaceful people. Religious Jews in particular simply want to be left alone by the world.

I've found there's plenty of stuff to make me wince in the holy texts of my Jewish tradition.

Other good books I've read of late include THEY SHALL BE MY PEOPLE by Paul Wilkes, CHOSEN BY GOD by Joshua Hammer, and THE SOUND OF ONE GOD CLAPPING by Rabbi Alan Lewes.

JRob writes: I've been corresponding with a woman in Israel. Two interesting things have come from that contact. The first is that she stated the Israeli media never shows pictures of Palestinian children injured or killed in the conflict. Much of the Israeli public is truly (or willfully) unaware of Palestinian innocents injured or killed by the Israeli military. The second is her unscientific (but anecdotally significant) statement that "50% of us can't stand the religious domination of our government." She has told me that "everyone I know is Jewish by blood, but we only go to temple during the big holidays to make our families happy." Sort of like Christmas and Easter christians. She is personally of the opinion that they could find peace with the Palestinians if they could get rid of the religious element of their government. She told me she admires the way the American government, while it appeases the rabidly christian element in the country, separates religion from the practicalities of government.

Ian writes: I was a fan of lukeford.com in its great days, and I find lukeford.net just as interesting. The 'new' site is just as quirky, since you haven't changed your ways, and you have managed to keep most of your literate contributors, such as Chaim Amalek, Goddess, Rumdar, etc. There's less titillation, of course, but there's also less (in fact, no) foul-mouthed ranting, of the kind that used to pollute your former site. If you could add more gossip you might still aspire to achieve, in the world of 'respectable' entertainment, something like the influential position you undoubtedly held in the porn scene.