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5-8-98 Prager poured out derisive terms at the beginning of his 5/8/98 show, calling a man he does not know, a "moron and an idiot." The man's crime? His daughter says he is the biggest anti-smoker in the world. Daughter says in Monday's 5/4/98 USA Today that her smoking cost her a place on the school track team and damaged her relationship with her father. A caller challenged Prager: The girl probably lost her place on the track team because it hurt her stamina. P contended that the school kicked her off. But when Prager found the USA TODAY reporter, it turned out that the girl lost her place on the team because she lost her stamina. In the 1960s, liberalism meant race blindness says P. Since then it has meant racial preoccupation. Cornell has race based dormitories. A caller and Prager agreed that P's greatest gift was articulating common sense. In his second hour, Prager talked about what parents should ask of their children. P says that parents should have limited areas where they harangue their kids. Parents should emphasize character and goodness. A couple of wimpy sounding homosexual men phoned Prager in his second hour. They felt hurt that P did not honor their homosexuality, did not back them up, so to speak. They felt annoyed that Prager thought their sexual expression was inferior to heterosexual marriage. They felt that Prager put them down, poked fun at them, separated them from everyone else. Prager finds homosexuality the most wrenching issue in modern life. Prager "knows" that a homosexual has not chosen to be one. But that is not the only issue. Prager believes that society chooses how much homosexuality it will have. P believes that the inclusion of bisexuals in the gay liberation movement undermines its central argument - that homosexuals have no choice. But bisexuals, by definition, do choose. Dennis has long said that the inclusion of many groups in the civil rights movement has been a terrible disservice to black Americans who uniquely suffered in the United States.
Wall Street Journal 5/7/98: By DENNIS PRAGER
The details of the alleged crime were gruesome enough: Larry Froistad, 29, confessed to his on-line alcoholism support group that he had murdered his five-year-old daughter, Amanda, in 1995 during a custody battle with his ex-wife. According to the New York Times, Mr. Froistad set his house on fire with Amanda inside, climbed out the window, and then, in Mr. Froistad's words, "set about putting on a show of shock, surprise and grief to remove culpability from myself. Dammit, part of that show was climbing in her window and . . . hearing her breathe and dropping her where she was so she could die and rid me of her mother's interferences."
If anything could be more horrifying than this, it is the reaction of some fellow members of the support group, Moderation Management. While several reported the confession to authorities, others opposed informing and expressed support for Mr. Froistad. One member, for example, expressed concern that Mr. Froistad "might be contemplating suicide" over "what seems to have become for you an awful situation." He urged Mr. Froistad "to seriously think about contacting a therapist and working things through with yourself in a safe manner."
Another user sent an angry e-mail to a man who had informed the authorities: "Just how big a pervert are you? I bet you really get off talking to the FBI. Wow. Did you ask them if you could see their guns?" (Mr. Froistad has been charged with murder; his lawyers have indicated he is "mentally ill" and will plead not guilty.)
The reaction of Mr. Froistad's support group provides a microcosm--and an explanation--for much of America's moral confusion. Since the 1960s, America has become a big support group. We are expected to support our fellow citizens, however antisocial they are, and not to judge them. Deviance has been defined down, in Daniel Patrick Moynihan's memorable phrase; and when deviants "open up," they are cheered, as on some television talk shows. This world view can be summed up in a few basic principles:
Psychological explanations trump moral standards. Since the 1960s, the words "good" and "evil" have been largely expunged from the vocabulary of sophisticated Americans. They speak instead in terms of "healthy" and "sick." That is why we are expected to feel sympathy for people who commit evil acts--after all, they're not responsible for their sickness. Even the Soviet Union, in this view, was a sick empire rather than an evil one: When Moscow shot down a Korean passenger plane in 1983, a psychologist writing in Psychology Today warned against labeling it an act of "aggression." Rather, it was an act of "paranoia." Feelings matter more than behavior. One day when my older son was two years old and playing in a park, a five-year-old boy walked over to him and threw him onto the concrete. The boy's mother, seeing what her son had done, ran over to him and cried, "Honey, what's troubling you?" I knew nothing about this woman, but I was certain that she was highly educated. One must learn to respond the way she did. The average mother a generation ago would have severely reprimanded any child of hers who threw down a toddler. Self-esteem is more important than self-control. This shift in emphasis from character to psyche is not only morally wrong but foolish.... Friday, May 8, 1998 Dennis started the show discussing an article that appeared in Monday's USA Today about a high school girl whose father ostracized her because she began smoking cigarettes. According to the article her father broke off the relationship because he is a devout anti-tobacco proponent. Dennis said that for the sake of the show and because the article appeared in a quality publication he will assume that what the girl said is true. He said that what the father did was stupid. He said that if the father broke off the relationship with his child because of cigarettes, she is better off without him. Cigarette smoking is not an evil. This girl did not commit a crime legally nor morally. Dennis said that stigma years ago came when high school girls became pregnant, or committed a crime; now, the stigma comes from smoking. Dennis said that this is another example of our society's broken moral compass.
In the final hour Dennis told his listeners that parents can't drive their kids crazy about too many things. They need to pick that which they care most about and try to let the rest go. You can't mold your child into a perfect being. Dennis has chosen character and goodness for his kids. He wants them to take school seriously but he does not make a big deal over grades. He said that he drives his kids crazy over their character and being kind to others. His kids, even the five year-old, knows that this is what mommy and daddy care most about. One caller asked Dennis if he would be proud of his oldest son if he told Dennis he were gay? Dennis said "no." He also said he wouldn't be proud of him if he came to him to tell him that he were heterosexual. Dennis said that you should be proud over your child's actions, not what they are. Dennis said of course he would want his son to be heterosexual because he believes it to be society's ideal. But, just because you don't live up to an ideal does not mean you should be loved or viewed negatively. Dennis gave a personal example. He said that he considers "intact" families to be society's ideal. He divorced; therefore, he did not live up to an ideal. Dennis said that if his eldest son told him he were gay he would feel disappointment but that he would not love him or honor him one iota less. The same caller asked Dennis how he would feel if his son chose a different religion? Dennis said that he would feel bad because he is not a Jew because he likes it the same way some people like cars or collecting stamps. He is a Jew because he believes the Jewish religion to be a true path to God. Therefore, he would like his son to carry on the Jewish religion and pass it on to his children. Thursday, May 7, 1998 There was a picture in the Los Angeles Times of the Pope praying by 3 caskets. The caskets contained the bodies of two murder victims and the murderer. Dennis began this show lamenting the Pope's decision to honor the murderer. Dennis said that if he was the murdered he would not want his murderer to be placed next to him and that he would find it insulting if the Pope honored his murderer. And, if he was the loved one of the murdered he would be sickened to see the caskets next to each other and angry at the Pope for honoring the evil thug who stole his loved one's life.
In the third hour, Dennis discussed the issue of putting feelings before actions. He told the story of when his eldest son was 2 and playing in a park, for no reason a 5 year-old boy he did not know came over to him and pushed him down onto the cement. The older boy's mother ran over to her son, hugged him and said "what is troubling you darling?" Dennis said that he knows nothing of this woman other than that she probably went to graduate school - because her reaction was a learned behavior. He said that a natural reaction would have been to run over to her son and tell him that what he did was wrong and that he should never do that to a baby. If she wants to find out later what's going on with the boy, why he would do such a terrible thing, that's fine; but her initial reaction should have been that of condemnation. Dennis said that it is not good for society that children are being raised only to focus in on their own feelings, that the focus should be on their actions to others and that although it is important (and shouldn't be ignored), their feelings should be addressed secondarily.
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