Rabbinic Sex Abuse

Dateline Of Reporting On Rabbinic Sex Abuse

Jewish Whistleblower writes March 22, 2005:

Rabbinical leaders have been reported by journalists. These are the more key events in which the reporting and reports became part of the story, in which the effect of the reporting was beyond the mere scope of the stories reported. journalism and rabbinic abuse - "watershed" events

1) 1994 CBC half-hour documentary on Rabbi Ephraim Bryks played nationally in Canada on the #1 evening news program.

- ran twice nationally and twice on local affiliate

- parts were run on the CNN Headline News network

- was nomminated for several and won at least one major journalism award (The New York Festivals' 1994 International TV Programming and Promotion Awards - bronze medal news documentary/special)

- most extensive and expensive journalistic investigation in this area (reprortedly over $25,000 spent producing)

- I believe the first major news expose in this area - spawned the only documented lawsuit in this area between Rabbi and reporters/news organization (both in Canada and the US).

2) 1996 JTA series - by Debra Nussbaum Cohen - first major series in this area by a national Jewish news organization

3) 1999 National coverage in Israel of sexual abuse at the jewel in the crown of the religious Zionist Bnei Akiva yeshivah network and the darling of the parent National Religious Party - evidence of a cover-up at senior levels of the rabbanut - was the "Israeli Lanner" case - a real turning point in this area, similar to Lanner in the US

4) 2000 Baruch Lanner - obvious

5) 2003 Washington Post article on Rabbi Sidney Goldenberg - major article in general media that addresses the wider issue of rabbinic abuse in a way that no general media publication had before

6) 2003 Matis Weinberg - again journalists played a major role - major story broken by college newspaper

7) 2003 - Newsday series (6 articles in total) by Stephanie Saul - 1st series on this issue in the general media

8) 2003 Mordecai Tendler - 1st major story broken on the blogosphere, Steven I. Weiss broke this story (unnamed Rabbi at the time) on his Protocols blog on Makor

9) 2004 Gafni - major story that crossed borders, Jewish denominations and medium - story that was broken by Luke Ford on-line in the blogosphere in a way never done before

Do the Orthodox Jews have a Catholic-priest problem?

Robert Kolker writes 5/22/06 in New York magazine:

On May 4, Framowitz filed a $20 million federal lawsuit against Kolko and Yeshiva Torah Temimah of Flatbush, Brooklyn, for what Framowitz says happened on at least fifteen occasions over two years, from 1969 to 1971—in the front seat of the Plymouth, and at the yeshiva at the end of recess, and at Camp Agudah in the Catskills, where Kolko worked for several summers.

...Framowitz’s attorney, Jeffrey Herman, was expected to file a separate, $10 million suit on behalf of an unnamed plaintiff who says he was abused by Kolko in the late eighties. All told, Herman says he knows of as many as twenty victims between the ages of 19 and 50 who say they were abused by Kolko.

...Rabbi-on-child molestation is a widespread problem in the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community, and one that has long been covered up, according to rabbis, former students, parents, social-service workers, sociologists, psychologists, victims’ rights advocates, and survivors of abuse interviewed for this story.

Where Can Survivors Of Rabbinic Sex Abuse Turn For Help?

Jewish Whistleblower writes 3/25/05:

Who can victims/survivors go to for help? Rabbi Mordechai Tendler case exposes the sad simple fact that in the post-Lanner era little has changed.This seems to be the key question now again being asked. Where do you go? Who will help you? Who can you trust?I do not have the answers to these questions but let’s look at the organizations and individuals that failed victims/survivors in this situation and review what we’ve previously discussed.

1) OHEL and rabbinical leaders

In early 2003, several of the women who say they were sexually exploited by Rabbi Mordecai Tendler contacted Rabbi Dovid Cohen the Halachic advisor for Ohel for help. He did not help them.Various rabbinical leaders and community leaders were approached over the years. But nothing was done.

2) Agunot advocacy organizations and their leadership

They utterly abandoned and failed victims/survivors. At worst supported and continued to send women to Rabbi Mordechai Tendler, at “best” remained silent.

3) Rabbi Mark Dratch (Jsafe) and the RCA

In December 2003, during the question-and-answer session of a Makor forum on rabbinical abuse, several female health-care professionals in the audience spoke with frustration about Rabbi Mordechai Tendler and made accusations of rabbinical sexual misconduct, which they reported has been going on for years.This led to the current long and protracted RCA investigation that has just in the last 9 days resulted in Rabbi Mordechai Tendler's expulsion from the RCA.

Rabbi Dratch initially put together investigation materials but stepped aside as others in the RCA took over the investigation as there was a feeling that there may be a conflict of interest due to Rabbi Dratch's past involvement in The Awareness Center.

An outside organization Praedium was brought in to investigateVictims/survivors and other witnesses were told that their information would be treated confidentially and NOT handed to Rabbi Mordechai Tendler. They were betrayed.

Although, Rabbi Dratch was certainly not the source of the RCA betrayal, he did make a mistake. He told victims/survivors that his colleagues would treat their information confidentiality, something he should never have done as his colleagues turned out to be far from honorable in this regard. Hopefully, in his Jsafe organization he will choose his colleagues with more caution. It is clear that he has lost some trust among victims/survivors as a result of this. It is also clear that in the future advocates helping victims/survivors will be less inclined to trust or tell victims/survivors to trust the RCA or Jsafe. Both will have to take steps to re-establish their credibility as trustworthy. The question remains today, can a victim/survivor go to the RCA for help? Can they trust that the RCA will act professionally? Can they trust that confidentiality will be respected? These questions remain.

I would note:

a. No counseling services/resources and no legal representation were provided to victims/survivors. Once again raising the question of why such resources are not available to victims of abuse in the general community.

b. During the entire investigation, Rabbi Mordechai Tendler continued to act as a pulpit rabbi and provide counseling to women.I also want to clarify an important point. Rabbi Dratch has been criticized as part of the RCA for this betrayal. I believe Rabbi Dratch is a good and decent man. I believe he truly wants to make a difference. As I have posted in the past, he has a long commitment to this issue and has been a powerful advocate. He clearly understands that there is no simple solution to how to deal with these type of cases or how to advocate:

As far as the postings are concerned, I understand Vicki's point. The allegations are usually true, the information needs to be out there to help protect others and to inspire others to come forward, etc. At the same time, others are totally alienated from her work because they feel that there are no checks and balances and that anyone could possibly find their names and pictures posted (inappropriately) with no recourse, suffering untold damages, etc. I don't know of an appropriate medium. Neither extreme works for me. I know of the difficulties and sometimes long lengths of time it takes to adjudicate and the system often fails. I don't know the answer, really. But I think that there needs to be some kind of review process that takes many factors into account. That will ensure greater credibility in the larger community for the project and will be more ethically sound.

I personally disagree with Rabbi Dratch in this regard. An initial review process in untenable. It is NOT possible to investigate these type of cases and come to conclusions like “guilty/innocent”. That is for the courts or a future Sanhedrin to determine. No other religion is taking such an approach and for good reason. Each and every case is difficult. It may take decades to understand the whole picture. Look how long the Rabbi Mordechai Tendler case has dragged on. That is why I advocate the same approach as other religions. Post all public cases that are documented in any way, shape or form. Put the information in the public's hands.

We are a very “rights of the abuser” focused society. This must change. The rights of the past/current/future victims should be equally focused on. It clearly isn't.

I would only remove cases when the parties involve make a formal request and submit to a full review by professionals directly in the field of sexual abuse who have both the education and experience to fully comprehend and analyze the dynamics involved.

Here is a case I would like to see addressed by Rabbi Dratch/Jsafe:

Anthony Roberts a former teacher at an Orthodox school in England was recently found “not guilty of sexually abusing a 14 year-old student. Mr. Roberts maintains his innocence and will almost certainly be back in education in some Jewish community within a few years.

Should he be back in education? What would/could Jsafe do?

I know of cases in kashrut where shochtim with questionable behavior (unrelated to shita) were told that even though there was not enough evidence for a beis din to find them guilty, the fact that a chashas (suspicion) exists is enough that they are no longer welcome in kashrut. The justification? They should never have put themselves in a position where they could be compromised. As shochtim they must be beyond reproach.Should we not have stronger standards as to who works with our children then we have in kashrut?

4) The Jewish press played an important role in this case. Both Gary Rosenblatt and Rukhl Schaechter (in particular) have written powerful articles.

I would note that although I praise Rosenblatt for stories like Rabbi Lanner, I have been and continue to be critical of the arbitrary standards he applies to sexual abuse stories. If the general media had used similar standards, there would be no Catholic Church scandal. He has refused to do proper investigative reports on numerous cases such as, Rabbi Ephraim Bryks, Rabbi Lewis Brenner (see quote and link below regarding this area). He is too quick to acquiesce to senior RCA members in letting them investigate and deal with such situations quietly (Rabbis Bryks and Tendler). He has also delayed stories for no good reason (Rabbi Mordechai Gafni).

As I've pointed out before, people turn to him for help believing that the reporter that broke the Lanner story will help them. Unfortunately, many victims/survivors find no help. He has simply refused to investigate many stories in this area. Unfortunately, he is the one reporter that everyone is referred to.

"The professional dilemma this poses for me, and this newspaper, which already has a reputation — I believe undeserved — for Orthodox bashing, is whether we are now to become the central communal clearinghouse for dealing with and outing Orthodox Jewish officials with various sexual deviancies. I don’t think that’s our role."

Unfortunately, there are few Jewish press reporters willing to even do stories in this area and the general media has been reluctant to do stories in this area. I was asked to list Jewish reporters who could be approached recently. I could only name the above two. Many reporters after doing stories in this area are so disturbed by the material that they avoid doing further work in this area. Several reporters I have approached have told me exactly that.

5) The Awareness Center was the one organization that showed backbone, the one organization that advocated for these women, the one organization that tried to find resources for them even when it had none of its own, the one organization that did not betray these women, the one organization that was not quiet and the one organization that put its reputation on the line for these wome. If ever there was proof of the need for an advocacy organization like the Awareness center, it is stories like this.

Now if only it had proper resources of its own.

................

Charlotte Schwab writes in her book Sex, Lies, and Rabbis: Breaking a Sacred Trust:

When I was asked to contribute to the article Lilith magazine was preparing about Carlebach's alleged sexual misconduct, I refused, asking why they would not publish articles about living rabbis who have transgressed, who still transgress, rather than writing about a deceased rabbi, about cases which cannot be investigated formally because the accused rabbi is deceased. They chose not to write about living rabbis who are accused of sexual misconduct. I had the same experience with Moment magazine. I was told they would not publish anything "against" rabbis. An assistant editor there told me that a rabbi who was regular contributor to the magazine had effectively "killed" the article I submitted to them which she, and possibly others there, wanted to see them publish. Further, in trying to find a publisher for this book, several large publishing houses told my agent that they "would not 'take on' the rabbinic establishment."

The Orthodox Union and Rabbinical Council of America

On the morning of January 25, 2002, I placed a telephone call to the Orthodox Union in New York City to see if anything had changed as a result of the Rabbi Baruch Lanner case... I informed the receptionist who answered that this was a long distance call, and that I wanted information about whether the Orthodox Union or Rabbinical Council of America has a policy regarding rabbis' sexual misconduct. The call was given to a man who sounded angry from the minute he answered, and became angrier by the minute. I repeated to him that I was calling to ask if the Orthodox Union or the Rabbinical Council of America has a policy regarding sexual misconduct by their rabbis. He said, "I do not know what that means." Then, he snapped, "Any behavior that is contrary to halacha is not permitted." I asked what that meant. He said, abruptly, angrier, "Any behavior contrary to Jewish law or civil law is not permitted." I asked how a woman who has a complaint would proceed. He said, angrily, curtly, "Send me a letter; I presume your name will beon it," assuming I have a complaint. I asked, "What is your name?" He barked, "Rabbi Steven Dworken." I asked him to spell it. He did, curtly.

I asked, "What will be done with the letter? Is there any written down procedure? Who will be involved? How will you handle it?" He said, tersely, still sounding very angry, "We'll see. This is an internal matter. Shabbat shalom!" He sounded almost as if he were spitting the latter words out. The words, which mean have a peaceful Shabbat, and his tone were in entire contradiction. I could only shudder at what a woman who might call about having been abused by a rabbi would do at such a hostile response, and I could imagine her fear, her tears.

Journalist Yori Yanover (the webmaster of Worch's www.rebhershy.com) writes me 2/13/05:

The string of accusations by grown women against various rabbis, that said rabbis have used their position to manipulate them into having sex with them, marks a sad trend in the politics of sexuality, as well as the politics of Jewish egalitarianism.

There should be legitimate cases in which women may turn to the law against abusive men of authority. Employers are not permitted to demand sexual favors, or even to use sexual language, under penalty of law. And minors are not even permitted the right to concede to sexual advances. Statutory rape is rape is rape.

But when a grown woman depicts a rabbi's religious position as an argument to absolve her of responsibility for having adulterous sex, it infantilizes her, and sets back the cause of women's egalitarian role in religious society. If women are so helpless that an authoritative gaze from a clergyman, or even concerted pressure, even nasty, abusive pressure, can cause them to succumb and have sex with him, we must conclude that it's too soon to permit women to have regular intercourse (no pun intended) in an open and unrestrictive fashion. We must shoo all our women into the house and bind them in chastity belts, because they're childlike and unable to withstand temptation.

A society of victims, unable to accept responsibility for their messes, is an infantilized society, one incapable of fending for itself spiritually and otherwise. We mustn't give in to the temptation of blaming our troubles on others. It is something only children do. Indeed, children and feeble minded people are entitled to be treated as potential victims. Grownups must account for their failures, even in the bedroom.

A Jewish woman writes Luke 12/15/04:

Okay Mr. Luke Ford... Chances are likely that either a) your account will regard this email as spam or b) your own eyes--undoubtedly due to dealing with thousands of incoming furious emails daily--will also regard this as spam and you won't bother reading it in any case. But because of a class on midrash & ethics I'm taking and a section we're doing on lashon hara I just read your shocking expose of Gafni--by whom I admit I was also fooled once upon a time. So then I tried to figure out who you are that you could write all this, and I discovered your website and related links, where I found mentions of your next book about rabbis who molest girls.

So here's my question: What do you get out of all this? I mean, besides fame and money, the obvious answers, I suppose-- But really, do you get some sort of fulfillment from waving around a red flag, pointing a great big finger and saying, "this one's a liar!" "this one's a rapist!" and so on and so forth? You must have some sort of beef against what you consider to be the "establishment", no? I mean I didn't read your other profiles in full, but are there any--is there anyone--you admire? Are there any you praise?

Something must have brought you to Judaism, but now it looks like you're intent on destroying its leaders--and hey, in the Orthodox world, to be quite honest that's pretty much fine with me. And yes, yes, undoubtedly Gafni is a world-class creep and very dangerous to the kind of little girls who were never taught how to take care of themselves, and sure he needs to be exposed, so kol hakavod on that one, I guess. But haven't you noticed something about yourself, that this in particular seems to be your obsession? Especially after your creepy little blog about shaking hands with women, yeesh...I always thought the shomer negiah stuff was beyond idiotic, but I suppose if the majority of men are as ridiculous about these things as you are about that then clearly I need to think twice before I offer to shake hands with another man. But surely not all men are like that, and possibly, you know, the shomer negiah thing and the obsession with molesters is, well, related...and a little...well...taking things further than they need to go? You think? I'm just curious about what you think you're really after here.

I reply:

I get emails like yours all the time. I can't expect most people to know about the economics of book publishing, but there are a thousands things I could do that would make more money (work at McDonalds) or gain more fame (write about other topics etc).

The reason to write this (same reason for my other books) is that it is an important matter that nobody else is doing adequately. It is an important and compelling topic that I can do well and contribute to the world and to the Jewish community. That leaves me with a deep unshakeable sense of leading a meaningful life (that comes from doing what you do well in a way that is a blessing to others).

As for my own psychology, that is between me and my friends and my shrink and my rabbi etc.

As for my general motivation to create and to make laughter, I do what I do the best I can and know that some people will understand and appreciate it. I do not write to gain general approval. I write for the narrow audience that gets my work, and I do not worry about the 90% who do not.

When you have to explain humor, it ceases to be funny. You either get it or you don't. I'm not going to write in crayon with different colors to distinguish satire from straight reportage. You should not read a phone bill the same way you read a love letter. You have to have some literary sensitivity to different forms of writing.

Regarding people and institutions I adore, I've written about them in depth. Regarding lashon hara, Judaism's sacred texts have no problem with holding Jewish leaders accountable for their behavior. "Thou art the man!"

When you expose misdeeds, you get heat from the narrow group of people affected negatively (as well as from people who have a kneejerk response to anything that is hurtful or smacks of gossip), but you rarely hear from the majority of people who are wiser and better informed because of your work (because they have no incentive to thank you because they don't think about who brought them the information, but those affected adversely have every incentive to complain).

Cheers, Luke

PS The deepest things I am after in life I am not likely to disclose to a stranger.

Jewish Whistleblower writes:

Although not addressed to me I will answer this too, as I've been posting about Gafni/Winiarz for close to 10 months and looking into his background for an additional year or so.

>What do you get out of all this?

I get a safer Jewish community, where those who are most vulnerable are not preyed on by degenerates like Gafni and further intimidated from coming forward by people like Gafni's enablers.

And I ask "anonymous Jewish woman" why she is more worried about Luke's ethics than the ethics of all those who've stood silent for decades concerning Gafni/Winiarz and his ilk and those who still enable Gafni and his ilk.

...............

I need a title for my new book on Orthodox rabbis who are sexual predators.

I was thinking of (inspired by the harrowing 2002 movie The Sisters Magdalene): You're Not A Man Of God: Orthodox Rabbis Who Are Sexual Predators.

Suggestions include:

* Below The Pulpit
* Rabbis Gone Bad
* Raging Rabbi
* Defiled Scroll
* No Longer Men Of God: Orthodox Rabbis Who Are Sexual Predators
* Power and Control: Sexual Misconduct of Rabbis
* Breaking the Taboo: Rabbis, Sexual Violence and the Jewish Community
* Secrets No More: Exposing Sexual Misconduct of our Rabbinical Leaders
* Exposing Reality: Rabbis who are Sex Offenders
* The Rabbi Secretes Behind The Veil
* Sex in the Scrolls
* Black-Hat Sex
* Saturday Night Sex
* Tuesday The Rabbi Did Me
* Above the Law (Halacha): Rabbis and Rape
* Because I love you: Rabbinical Sexual Misconduct
* From Rabbi to Rapist
* Rabbis Who Rape
* Rabbis Who Prey
* When Rabbis go bad
* The Rabbi Who Raped Me

Full disclosure by Luke Ford:

I was ejected from three Pico-Robertson Orthodox synagogues in 2001 (Young Israel of Century City, Beth Jacob and Chabad's Bais Bazalel, in that order) (related article on my Young Israel expulsion) and from one in 1998. Many in the Orthodox community (and elsewhere) say that my writing on rabbi-predators is motivated by my hatred for rabbis.

While I am not the last person in the world to write a book about rabbinic sex abuse, I am far from ideal for this task. To be pithy, my own life has not been a model of holiness. While I don't believe I've ever sexually abused anyone (nor have I been abused), what principally separates me from much of the conduct (between adults) described in this book is opportunity. I've never been in a position of religious leadership, and thank God for that.

I have other reasons for not writing this book. As a convert to Judaism, I don't want to criticize my adopted faith. To do so is an implicit criticism of my choice. When I look at the large number of rabbis who've taken advantage of their position, I wonder if there's not just something wrong with some religious Jews but with some parts of the Jewish religion.

I converted to Judaism because I thought the Torah made people better. Yet, in many cases in this book, the Torah seems to have made people worse. It became a tool to abuse the vulnerable.

Rabbis were my path into Judaism and I've depended on them to shape my life within Judaism. There's no class of people I admire more than rabbis and therefore there is no group I wish to trash less. (Yet I could write chapters on why the very opposite of what I've just argued is also true.)

When I go to shul, I want to see my friends (some of them rabbis) and have a nice time. I don't want to write things that could disturb this oasis in my life. Not only do I lack the moral standing to lecture people about sexual sins, I lack the education. Every rabbi in this book knows more Torah than I do.

While I accept my religion's strict standards of behavior, I haven't fully internalized them. Thus, I rarely get upset when I hear about sins between consenting adults. And when it comes to adulthood, I hold by my religion's ancient standard - 13 years old aka Bar Mitzvah. I'm willing to execute murderers down to age 13 and I regard it as good an arbitrary separation as any between child and adult.

While I would not get sexually involved with anyone under 18, and I support society's sanctions against those who do, I do not automatically regard sex between adults and post-pubescent teenagers under 18 as loathsome (in many cases I do regard it as loathsome). Throughout Jewish history, there have been adults, with the blessing of the community, who've married and had sex with those under 18.

I've never worried much about the morality of those in power having sex with those who seemingly are without power. I don't get incensed (though neither do I approve) when professors have at it with their students nor when bosses boff their secretaries.

If your boss says you must have sex with him or lose your job, I've always believed you should quit your job and get another one. To sue over such matters says to me that you lack the strength to control your life.

I don't buy into the whole victimhood mentality in these instances. I believe that people with an IQ over room temperature should be responsible for their own lives. If your husband forces you to have sex with him, then you should leave him and create another life. I don't think it should be a criminal matter.

If you get naked with someone you know and get raped (without any weapon being used or permanent physical damage inflicted), then you should wise up about those you get naked with. I don't think it should be a criminal matter and I don't think it has to haunt you for the rest of your life.

In other words, while I tell much of this book from the perspective of those it is easy to label victims, I don't buy into the modern language of victimology. And I don't automatically shun all predators.

I've had rabbi acquaintances who've been convicted of various sexual sins and crimes. One slept with women in his congregation. Another one received oral sex from a 14-year old girl. Another had child pornography on his computer.

While I oppose all such behavior, I never felt it was my place to tell these men that they had done wrong (nor did I choose to include them in this book). Instead, I related to them in a friendly manner.

Many cases which are popularly viewed through the prism of predator-victim, I view as more complex. When I watch the movie Lolita, I'm not at all sure who is the villain - the girl or the man?

When I hear about attractive female teachers who get into trouble for having sex with their underage male students, my primary reaction is to wish that I could've had such relations during my teens. (Though if I were to have a daughter one day, and was to find out that her teacher or rabbi had screwed her, I'd want to kill him.)

When I heard the stories I placed in this book, I rarely got upset. I rarely tried to comfort the purported victims and I rarely seethed to punish the purported predators. Rather, my overwhelming concern was to ferret out the facts and to tell the stories fairly and fearlessly.

How did I come to write this book? It just fell into my lap while I was blogging on Jewish matters in the summer of 2004. Initially I made fun of some stories of rabbinic sex abuse. Then I realized that the behavior I was satirizing was a serious problem that deserved serious reporting.

When I discussed my book with people, I was frequently asked these questions:

* Why did you write this?

I thought the topic compelling and important.

* What should we do about rabbinic sex abuse?

I don't know.

* Why do you focus on the Orthodox?

Because I find the Orthodox more dramatic and interesting than the other Jewish streams.

* Is sexual abuse a big problem in Orthodoxy?

It seems to be as large a problem as clergy abuse in Catholicism. I'll never forget the year 2001 when three Los Angeles Orthodox rabbis, in separate cases, pled guilty to sexually molesting children. Since then, whenever I open up a Jewish newspaper, I expect a story about rabbinic sex abuse.

* How do you know if a person is guilty of sex abuse?

It is difficult to know because such abuse usually occurs behind closed doors, but there are some good indicators:

-- If someone pleads guilty.
-- Coworkers see or hear something bad going on.
-- If the testimony of those abused is consistent, and they make verifiable claims about their abuser and the circumstances in which it occurred.

* Do the Orthodox view women as property?

I've never seen that. I've never met an Orthodox husband who viewed his wife as property akin to his car. I've never met an Orthodox wife who viewed herself as chattel.

* How do the Orthodox deal with sex abuse?

There is no orthodox Orthodox reaction. Each community deals with it differently. Some cooperate with law enforcement while others try to take care of things in-house. Many communities eject predators. Until recently, this was usually done without warning the predator's new community.

* What's the psychology behind a sexual predator?

Men act like predators when they can (unless constrained by values and fears).

* Are you worried your book will cause anti-Semitism?

No. Jews in 21st Century America can usually feel secure about threats from the goyim. As Dennis Prager says, our biggest problems are internal to our community.

* How do you reconcile this book with Judaism's laws against forbidden speech (lashon hara)?

While I can't fully reconcile my writing with Jewish law (certainly not with the Chafetz Chaim's interpretations), I strive to follow the example of Judaism's sacred texts, such as the Bible and the Talmud, which have no compunction about holding Jewish leaders accountable for their actions.